`_forgottenpromises-*

2006-06-18T16:40:00.000+08:00

and after 7624184926 years, THIS is finally done.
(:

2006-02-27T12:24:00.000+08:00

DAMN DIARY-X.

fortunately i have been using it for only 2 months. if i had been using it for like 2 years and they just delete my whole journal in a split second without any warning, im gonna like... i dunno, sue them or sthh.

so anw, im gonna start a new blog [again] using blogspot. will link the url here when i think of one. till then! :D

-loves (:

2005-12-09T20:57:00.000+08:00

I HAVE A NEW BLOG! :D click here!

anyhow, since this is the last entry [and its the time of thanksgiving], i shall be nice. ((: loves people. <33

!AILEEN! - thanks for always laughing at my jokes. thanks for letting me sleep with two pillows which left u with none to sleep with. LOL. thanks for having a common enemy with hmgc*. oops.

!AUDREY! - thanks for being such a sweet junior. thanks for always smiling. thanks for being the EVIL AUD i love. thanks for always being so friendly. thanks for scaring me that time at formosa hur. LOL. i still rmb!

!BAITONG! - thanks for being my dumbass. thanks for all your entertainment when im bored. thanks for all ur advice. thanks for always saying u miss me. LOL. thanks for being just so funny. thanks for being my boyfriend. LOL.

!BEL! - thanks for being my fellow supporter. thanks for always laughing at my jokes. thanks for les-ing with me in the hall. thannks for hiding in the cupboard with me during SYF. [LOL!] thanks for doing the funny ostrich walk with me.

!BENJAMIN! - thanks for all your photos. thanks for dealing with my screams. thanks for helping me carry my bag. thanks for always helping me in everything [well almost]. thanks for coming online when i scream in my sms. LOL. yea u know words aint enough.

!CHERI! - thanks for being such a sweet junior. thanks for always being so friendly. thanks for ur compliments. thanks for always calling me AUNT KAIYAN. [tho i still dont get ur joke] LOL.

!CHIAN LIM! - thanks for always treating drinks. thanks for being so nice to bully. thanks for always making me and pearl laugh. thanks for being such a useless chairman in sec 2 that allowed everyone to walk over u. LOL. thanks for always hitting my head hur.

!CLARISSA! - thanks for the bra hur. lol. thanks for singing and dancing with me. thanks for always waiting for me before and after dance. thanks for being such a nice dance partner. thanks for writing all the sweet stuffs on my txbk.

!CLAUDIA! - thanks for always telling me the hw. thanks for the sharing the hotel with us. thanks for always laughing at our jokes. thanks for always telling me wad to study for tests. thanks for being such a helpful and sweet girl.

!DANIEL! - thanks for always helping me with my work. thanks for replying my sms with very clear explanation. thanks for always being so helpful. thanks for being the mr nice guy. thanks for always being so friendly.

!DALLAN! - thanks for listening. thanks for all ur advices. thanks for letting me lie on ur stomach [LOL]. thanks for being so funny [i always thot ure EXTREMELY funny]. thanks for the fun times in bugis.

!ESTHER! - thanks for being my wonderful stead. thanks for all your encouragement. thanks for all ur good luck msgs before my exams. thanks for being enthu-dance with me. THANKS FOR CALLING ME MRS CHEN. thanks for always finding the right words to say. thanks for loving me.

!GRACE! - thanks for being such an enthu junior in dance. thanks for always giving that sweet smile of urs. thanks for being being understanding. thanks for ur msges. thanks for asking for my advices for ur streaming. lol.

!GUAN WEI! - thanks for hanging out with our clique. thanks for being such a nice spy. LOL. thanks for being so helpful. thanks for the nice smile you always show me.

!HARRY! - thanks for always messing up my hair hur. lol. thanks for helping me with HIM that time. thanks for trying to steal my nano hur. [slap u arhh] lol. thanks for being so friendly and always waving.

!HMGC*! - [I SHALL CAPS] THANKS FOR ALWAYS WAITING FOR ME DURNG OUTINGS CUZ IM ALWAYS LATE. THANKS FOR FINDING ME VERY FUNNY. THANKS FOR UNDERSTANDING OUR LANGUAGE [ NUA, PONG!, EROTIC!, ORH ORH!, MING MING!, C..CH..CHIO? FOLK! -SCREAMS- ETC ]. THANKS FOR ALWAYS ACCOMPANYING ME TO WATCH HIM. THANKS FOR ALL THE HAPPY TIMES WE HAD IN CLASS. THANKS FOR ALL THE NICE NEOPRINTS WE TOOK. THANKS FOR ALWAYS HELPING ME SPY. THANKS FOR BEING SO ENCOURAGING. THANKS FOR ALWAYS STANDING BY MY SIDE. THANKS FOR ALWAYS LAUGHING AT MY JOKES. THANKS FOR ALWAYS SUCKING UP TO LAONIANG. THANKS FOR ALL THE WONDERFUL MEMPORIES. i love u guys. -sniffs-

!IVY! - thanks for always poking me hur. lol. thanks for always being so enthu and shouting my name when you see me. LOL. thanks for always taking the initiative to talk to me. thanks for being such a friendly junior.

!JESLYN! - thanks for always smiling. thanks for being enthu in dance. thanks for always complimenting me. thanks for alwys being so friendly.

!JANICE! - thanks for being such a sweet girl. thanks for all the fun time in dance. thanks for contributing in that bra hur! [dont think i dunno ok. lol.] thanks for always slacking with me in dance. thanks for the pink pinglets thing. lol.

!JESSICA! - thanks for being such a great chairman. thanks for always being so helpful. thanks for the pic u washed for me. lol. thanks for always being so friendly and easy to talk to.

!JIA HAO! - thanks for being my bro. thanks for always cracking unfunny jokes [really see ur effort there. LOL]. thanks for always helping me pink those pens i always drop on the floor. thanks for always saying im short hur. lol. U ARE NOT MUCH BETTER.

!JING HUI! - thanks for being ah toot [love calling u that]. thanks for letting us mess up ur house. =x thanks for being so blur and funny. thanks for all the wondeful times in sec 1 and 2.

!JIE YIM! - thanks for listening. thanks for all ur advices. thanks for being forgiving [u know wad i mean] thanks for always watching over dance. thanks for all the fun time on the mrt and in buigis.

!JOANNA! - thanks for your letters. thanks for always trying to cheer me up. thanks for your advices and encouragement. thanks for being so funny. thanks for always caring bout me and him. yea u know words aint enough too.

!JOLENE! - thanks for being my twin. thanks for doing all the funny bimbotic stuffs with me. thanks for being the manager of SHE. lol. thanks for all the fun times in dance. thanks for being my partner in dreaming of u. LOL. THANKS FOR PEEPING AT ME WHEN I WAS CHANGING. [omgg damn u. LOL]

!JOSHUA! - thanks for being such an enthu di. thanks for always complimenting me. thanks for all ur sweets. thanks for all ur sms. thanks for always trying to organize an outing. lol.

!JUN WEI! - thanks for being so shuai for the girls to drool. lol. thanks for always cracking unfunny joke on msn. thanks for the fun times in sec 3. thanks for slacking with me.

!KAH YEOW! - thanks for always being so friendly. thanks for always crapping with me. thanks for all your msgs. thanks for agreeing with me that KY rawkk. LOL.

!KATHARINE! - thanks for being such a cute frienly junior. thanks for your compliments. thanks for always chatting with me on msn. thanks for being so enthu in dance. thanks for telling me u like single eyelids. LOL.

!KELVIN! - thanks for always being so friendly. thanks for giving me info on him. thanks for spying on my hp hur. lol. thanks for loving our dear lp [jkjk].

!KENRICK! - thanks for always sending me home when theres rehearsals. thanks for all the strepsils u bought when i had the sickening sorethroat. thanks for always chatting on msn with me when im bored. thanks for being such a great senior in dance.

!KIAT HOW! - thanks for all the wonderful memories. thanks for being the perfect gentlemen i know noone can ever beat u. thanks for always protecting me. thanks for buying me candies when i was doing my work. thanks for pei-ing me study geo. thanks for telling me your password. thanks for working with me. thanks for always sending me home without fail. thanks for always placing surprise gifts at my doorsteps. thanks for always giving me cash to spend when im going shopping [ ERHEMS I RETURNED HIM EVERYTHING HOR]. thanks for all the hearts u folded for me. thanks for walking with me on the beach. thanks for sheltering me in the rain. thanks for your card, necklace, watch, photoframe, glassbottle, ring, dogs, bear, movies and etc. thanks for crying over me. thanks for tolerating the very unreasonable me without even complaining. and thanks for the erm, very sweet first kiss.

!KONG LIM! - thanks for being such a helpful guy. thanks for always explaining sums to me. thanks for helping us cook the food during chalet. thanks for always snatching the radio with me during lower sec hur. LOL

!KOON HUI! - thanks for being so nice to bully too. lol. thanks for being able to take those jokes we put on u. thanks for entertaining me and spens almost every morning. thanks for always redo-ing the duty roster that noone follows. thanks for being the cleaniness rap and keeping our classrm so clean.

!LEONARD! - thanks for always wishing me good luck before my exams. thanks for always chatting with me. thanks for all ur sms. thanks for the conference. LOL. super lame.

!LIPING! - thanks for the perfumes. thanks for always being so concern. thanks for being so entertaining. thanks for all your info you helped me dig. LOL. thanks for acting bimbo with me. yea alot more. words aint enough.

!LOUIS! - thanks for always being so friendly. thanks for helping me carry those stacks of books home. thanks for being such gentlemen. thanks for always chatting with me on msn. thanks for always giving me that grin.

!MADELINE! - thanks for being such a friendly junior. thanks for always smiling. thanks for being so spontaneous during sec 1 camp. thanks for the soft toy. thanks for giving the guys my birthday card to sign.

!MEI LUAN! - thanks for being such a great eng partner[think i would die w/o u]. thanks for always being so concern over me and him. thanks for all the stuffs u shared with me. thanks for helping me take those pics. thanks for being such a lovely girl.

!MEL! - thanks for being totally funny. thanks for that pic [OMG!]. thanks for always giving me those credible info on him. thanks for contagious laughter that never fail to make me laugh. lol.

!MING WEI! - thanks for being someone so easy to talk to. thanks for all ur sms u sent during those nights. thanks for sharing with me the story of u and ur girl. thanks for ur pink towel [love it]. thanks for always being so sunny.

!PEARL! - thanks for being my laogong. thanks for always being by my side. thanks for all your advices and comforts. thanks for being so totally funny [or maybe only i think so]. LOL. yea so much so much more. dear u know words aint enough too.

!PEIWEN! - thanks for being such a great partner during camp. thanks for always being so friendly. thanks for always disiao-ing me la hur. lol. thanks for all the fun times during sec 1 and 2.

!PHAY! - thanks for being such cute juniors. thanks for always being so friendly. thanks for ur compliments. thanks for always smiling and greeting me. thanks for being enthu in dance.

!PUIYIN! - thanks for being such a sweet girl. thanks for always giving me foolscap. lol. thanks for being that irritating bigass. thanks for always laughing at wadeva i do hur. LOL. idiot.

!QIHUI! - thanks for being my carrot [or omelette?]. LOL. thanks for being my dear [eeeee!]. LOL. thanks always giving me THAT face. thanks for being so funny. thanks for being the only one who always ask me for joke of the day. LOL.

!QIHUI! [DANCE]- thanks for being my beloved nu er. thanks for always greeting ur mommy. thanks for always chatting with me. thanks for being such a sweet girl. thanks for all the hugs.

!RACHEL! - thanks for teaching me the ketchup dance. thanks for being such a sweet junior. thanks for always being so friendly. thanks for loving dance. thanks for all the nice neoprints we took. thanks for always smiling.

!REBECCA! - thanks for being so friendly. thanks for always complimenting me. thanks for being such a nice junior. thanks for taking the initiative to catch up with me.

!SAM! - thanks for ur baos. thanks for ur mua-chee joke [super funny yeah]. thanks for being so fun-loving in dance. thanks for helping me run to PS to buy my contacts that time. thanks for always hitting my head hur. lol.

!SHANA! - thanks for being my twin sis nun. LOL. [the nun part was very silly now that i think back] thanks for being so friendly. thanks for always smiling. thanks for being such a sweet junior who never fail to greet me. thanks for always tickling me hur! lol.

!SHAW KETT! - thanks for being a nice partner in class. thanks for always entertaining me with jays songs. thanks for always making me laugh in class. thanks for always giving me foolscap to waste. thanks for always chatting with me when im bored in class.

!SHENG QIANG! - thanks for cooking all the nice stuffs during bbq. thanks for being the joker of our lower sec classes. thanks for always treating me stuffs. thanks for cracking up the class.

!SHERRILYN! - thanks for being such a helpful girl. thanks for being such a wonderful host at home. thanks for all the fun times at ur house. thanks for all those pics. thanks for laughing at our jokes.

!SHIN! - thanks for being my jie-mei. thanks for always helping me out. thanks for always being so friendly in school. thanks for waiting for my train to come before u go off. thanks for always letting me.

!SHI BIN! - thanks for being my stead[LOL]. thanks for always smiling. thanks for being my nice little servant [u haven help me prepare the water -.-] thanks for being so friendly on msn, sms and in real life. thanks for being someone so great to chat with.

!SPENCER! - thanks for being so funny. thanks for all ur entertainment on msn. thanks for mugging with me till the wee hours in the past [and humji-ly sms each other. LOL]. thanks for your past advices. thanks for the very fun christmas at sentosa last year [OH MY GOD. LOL.]

!TERRANCE! - thanks for all ur treats. thanks for hangin out with us despite knowing our motive. LOL jkjk la. thanks for reading ALL my archives. omgg you`re one mad dude. thanks for being so friendly. thanks for being a laoniang-er. lol.

!TIMOTHY! - thanks for being my son. thanks for always wishing i`ll grow as tall as u. thanks for all the happy times slacking at the back of the class. thanks for rocking ur chair with me. thanks for always entertaining me.

!TIMOTHEUS! - thanks for being such a enthu laoniang-er. LOL. thanks for being understanding [yeah u know that time when i din feel like talking]. thanks for always bowing to me. thanks for being such a cute junior.

!TRACY! - thanks for listening. thanks for being so easy to chat with. thanks for ur advices. thanks for helping me[ u know what i mean]. thanks for telling me i can let down my hair in dance after i rebond. lol.

!XINJIE! - thanks for being my les. thanks for all the letters. thanks for being someone nice to chat with. thanks for helping me check out [u know who]. LOL. thanks for always being so enthu and friendly.

!WAH TUCK! - thanks for always calling me to chat. thanks for being so friendly. thanks for always telling ur friends stuffs about me hur. lol. thanks for telling me those chem stuffs [LIKE I DUNNO!]. lol.

!WEI JEY! - thanks for being such a friendly junior. thanks for snatching away my wallet hur. lol. thanks for always greeting me. thanks for always shouting his name everytime u see me hur. lol.

!WEI HONG! - thanks for laughing at my jokes. thanks for all ur advices. thanks for telling me those stuffs. thanks for being such a wonderful chairman for dance. thanks for always making me laugh when u walk past my class.

!WILLIAM! - thanks for being a gentlemen. thanks for always walking me home. thanks for always spending money on me. thanks for the very nice afternoons where we sat at the playground after school.

!WINSTON! - thanks for being such a active junior in dance. thanks for always smiling. thanks for always sending me good night msgs. thanks for always being so friendly and cute.

!YUHAN! - thanks for being such a fun loving person. thanks for being the class joker. thanks for the fun time when we were [WTH!] fishing. thanks for always taking my hp and snap pics of him and set as my wallpaper hur. lol. asshole.

!YUJIE! - thanks for being my fellow f-er. LOL. thanks for being the very out going junior i love to hang out with in dance. thanks for always being so funny. thanks for such a wonderful junior. thanks for being so easy to talk to.

!YUNIAN! - thanks for being so spontaneous during the sec 1 camp. thanks for always being so polite and sincere. thanks for always greeting me. thanks for always chatting with me. thanks for being my lil bro.

!ZHI LI! - thanks for all the advices u gave. thanks for pei-ing me thru the lonely nights. thanks for all ur concern sms. thanks for always being there. thanks for always encouraging me to strive for the things i want.

!ZIRUI! - thanks for everything.

2005-12-05T12:15:00.000+08:00

my voice still sarks. ahhh. and my cough din get any better. got worst? yea.

went PA ytd. WE WERE THE EARLIEST AGAIN. cool. :D sat in front of the studio mirror. deciding if i should tie my hair. dont wanna damage my rebonded hair. but i abominate dancing with my hair let down. cuz its just so irksome. tie then untie. tie then untie. lol. my stead got so irritated. :x "JUST TIE LA!" haha. so i did.

this weeks PA was basically the same as last weeks. warm up then ballet then the 1-and-a-2-and-a-3-and-a-4 dance then gym. except that we learnt the ketchup dance! haha. kinda cute. and facile. took only ten mins to learn it. =D thanks rachel and jan [ and roy if u really wanna count -.- sat there and comment and comment and comment].

watched the star awards! yea finally. I CAUGHT ADAM CHEN FOUR TIMES ON TV! :D first was when he walked to his seat. HOLDING BERLINDA`S [*^%#*!%#&@!] HAND. haha. second was when gurmit singh stood up to receive his top 10 award, adam patted gurmit on his shoulder. third was when gumit was on stage saying he wanted to take up mandrian course, and the camera turned to adam and friends and they were laughing. the last one was when jacelyn was on stage thanking. and the camera just randomly went over to the audience, AND I MANAGED TO CATCH ADAM IN ONE PATHETICALLY PUNY CORNER! ahhh. thats all. =( total less than 10 secs ok. grrr. unfair. haha. and i think chris and fann are like darn sweet or sthh. yepp.

i cant wait to get well soon. cuz everytime i cough, my blardie throat hurts damn badly. and i always thot i tasted blood in my mouth when i coughed. :/ and why did my mens come two weeks earlier. got a shock this morning. O.o no no im definitely not stressed cuz the intimidating Os is finally over. wads wrong with my hormones mann. something very wrong. must be thanks to him.

Im staring at my feet
my cheeks are turning red
Im searching for the words inside my head
whats wrong with my tongue
these words keep slipping away
I stutter, I stumble
like Ive got nothing to say

every time our gazes lock, i know i have so much yet to say; but why do my eyes always look away before i can even search for the right words to say.

2005-12-02T23:55:00.000+08:00

back. =] im freaking voice-less. and sick. i miss my voice. ahhhh. now that i realized.

wednesday. was already sick to begin with. went to IMM first to select the photos we want from the shoot. all came out quite nice. so had a hard time selecting. then saw mr chia and miss ong. sa jiao abit. then nice mr chia treated us Bali Thai. LOL. woah. spicy but nice. total of 119 bucks. =x okays felt quite bad. thanked him and left for east coast.

reached east coast park. had a hard time finding our 4o2// chalet. finally found it after like centuries and left our things there. then starting cycling. woah. darn shuangg. yea. after awhile. THEN GUESS WHAT. he came down to ecp and cycled too. =DD cycled with him lei. xing fu nots? SAY YES. =]] wahh. the way he cycle is darn shuaii. ahhh. ok pearl is gonna say im just biased again. LOL. no im not. HE IS.

then later me pearl n ben went to the beach there ourselves. took photos. nice. ((: LIKE DUH ITS OUR FACES. lol. went back chalet. started BBQ. hmgc* pigged once again. lol. HU SHI DAN DAN. =// yarr. dunno what did i eat. i SUDDENLY became voiceless. wa lau. so hard to communicate. so anw. then the guys next room wanted us to help them take care of their bike. but me and pearl went to play with it instead. LOL. that kinda two seater kind. wa lau. its so not as easy as it seems ok. were screaming like mad. haha. then wad. came back. the guys asked for hp no. BECUZ OBVIOUSLY THEY NEED TO CONTACT ME WHEN LIKE. I DUNNO. SAY LIKE STH TO DO WITH THEIR BIKE RIGHT? yaya. but the rest were like "DONT GEI GEI LA! YOU WANT HER NO. THEN SAY LA!" and as u know. their voice [esp pearl the silly pong pong] voices are like very thundering. so i was darn freaking sia sway-ed. i din give him my number. but THANK YOU pearl and benjamin for shouting out my hp no. and my email add to him in the end. -.o

midnight like 1. pei pearl home cuz she cant stay overnight. lol. from east coast we went to west coast. and from west coast we went back to east coast. PRO US. =D but all with the help of a very helpful person. =] thanks for fetching us here and there. THE CAR WAS SO COOL. u know what. i dont care. i wanna marry a rich guy. i swear i will. =]]

then that guy msged me and like "HELLO. IM THE GUY WHO ASKED FOR YOUR NO. MY NAME IS *****." lol. then i was like eeeee! why that name. LOL. =x ben says i should not be biased towards that name. haha okok. but i din reply him. and he msged again. -.- "HAHA. THANKS FOR HELPING ME TO TAKE CARE OF MY BIKE. HOW OLD ARE YOU?" -.-

then me lp ben kl and bt cycled to 7-11 for supper. not really supper. ermm some snacks at like 3+ midnight? uhh yar wadeva it that called. played truth or dare. crapp. i was the unlucky one.
"ok kaiyan. truth or dare?"
"omgg sway. ehhhs. truth la truth la. im too tired for a dare."
"ok. this question is quite perverse."
"hmmm. what?"
"WHAT IS YOUR CUP SIZE?"
-points middle finger at them-

cycled back again. wahh. a long long way. the guys were like complaining their THERE very pain. then the girls wre like our THERE also very pain. so i was like telling lp "WAH. MY THERE VERY PAIN. I DONT WANT CYCLE LE." and like guess whats her reply. "YA LO. PAIN LEI. MINE ALSO DARN PAIN. THINK SEX ALSO NOT SO PAIN LO." -.- yar thats the face we gave her. LOL. anw shes in shanghai. and i hope u read this. I MISS ALL YOUR DUMB ACTIONS. I MISS YOUR CONTAGIOUS LAUGHTER. I MISS OUR CHALET. loll. rmb my wilber kays. =D

reached chalet at like 4+midnight. sat down and talk. and blah blah. omgg. VERY VERY HILARIOUS. if u were there i bet u would die laughing. sadly we cant stay for long. lp me and ben got kidnapped soon after. so we had to leave the chalet at like 5+am. LOL. -.o din even slept or rest or wadeva. busy catching cockroach and trying on [censored!] and hiding slippers and video-ing and laughing till we went bonkers. LOL.

dunno why the kidnappers brought us to pasir ris. YAR LIKE DUNNO WHY. ahhas. reached there shopping mall and all the shops were closed. din slept a wink for the previous night so me lp and ben were bushed. then u know the osim those kinda massager armchair thing. they had a mini exhibition in the mall. felt like heaven when we saw it. headed towards them. booked a place each. AND SLEPT FOR 2 HOURS IN PUBLIC. sia swayy. woke up. think 10 sth le. headed down to the chalet at pasir ris to find people. =]]

reached their chalet. kinda sian at first. cuz very quiet. then then then. i heard his voice! HE JUST WOKE UP. =DD but he din know i was there. so he was like blur blur going to the toilet to wash up. later he saw me. kinda stunned. covered his face. LOL. wadd. he doesnt look that bad if he realised. O.o passed him the things. and he was like "ohh. xie xie. xie xie." after that wenta eat breakfast. then back to their chalet. chatted with meiluan for awhile. omgg shes totally funny. kept making me laugh. then helped me alot. with ... yarr thanks! =DD ilu.

after the rain stopped. walked out. the grass was so green. the weather was so fine. he was so shuai. THEN ANOTHER FAIRYTALE HAPPENED AGAIN! oh my tian! =DD why all the good stuffs always happen at the very very very last part. nvm it still happened. hey thankss again. =]] ahhhh.

dont ever wave bye to me again; becuz he shall be the last one to do so.
dont ever call my hp again; becuz he shall be the last one to do so.
dont ever hug me again; becuz he shall be the last one to do so.
=]]

so anw! slept for 15 hours straight went i reached home. woke up unknowingly. look at my clock. 6 sthh in the morning. too early to wake up during a holiday right. yepp went back to lalaland. tho im not worn out anymore. just wanted to stay in my bed. so comfy.

today went bukit panjang plaza with my bro. since ages we went out together. yea he treated me lunch again. hehhs. love being the younger one. shopped a little. alot of new shops. cool. so i bought some tops. a nice skirt. and lotsa hair and handphone accessories. and alot of diff nail polish. and blah blah. all so pretty pretty. okay i sound like a total bimbo. BUT I WENT TO THE LIBRARY NEXT. so shuddup. ((x like finally. yea borrowed 8 books myself. dunno why. sudden urge. but i think i can finish them all. YES DUH I CAN. if not i wouldnt be that dumb to borrow 8 and waste money cabbing home cuz its too heavy to be lugged. already finished 1. and i cant wait to finish the rest. so exhilarating. so i swear i will hit the books everytime im free. cuz it just feels so good. to just indulge in them and not think of anything else. yea anything else.

pictures again. cuz theres people asking me to post with more pictures. so yea. haha kays thats just an excuse. BUT ITS NOT LIKE U DUNNO HMGC* IS FREAKING ZILIAN. =DD and its true they ask me to post more pics kays! dont blame me.

chia eating so happily. he rawkks man.

look like ive just woke up. grrr.

the bikes that caused so much PAIN. lol. =//

awww. love her.

omgg i just realised it looks as if we were floating on water. LOL. they are gonna say its not funny. its not a joke la! really.

awww. loves.

ben looks spastic.

LIPING! I HOPE YOU SEE THIS PIC AND REMIND YOURSELF HOW RAWKING WE [AND JO] ARE. =DD

nothing much. ok something very random. but was just wondering if age really does matter after all? guess it does. i mean people takes time to mature. to learn. to grow right? cuz when he was your age, he was like what you are now. credulous, ungentlemen, irresponsible, insensitive. everything i wished he could break free from. and true enough now that he has grown. hes becoming more of a better person. MUCH MORE OF ONE. almost perfect. and then we got on good terms again. yea. so tell me u will too.

`so this is his so called "everything settled". rightt. ~~see, irresponsible and insensitive.~~

2005-11-29T22:55:00.000+08:00

[[ add on : this is for the dumbs dumbs out there who want to save the pics by trying to right click, and complain to me they cant save after they fail. LOL. hmm just leave the cursor on the pic u wanna save for a few secs and an icon will appear at the top left hand corner. then just press on some button can le. ok? DUMB! =DD ]]

okay. so here u go. to the people asking me to update bout prom. this entry`s everything on prom. ((: satisfactory? LOL.
[[ WARNING: alot of pictures below. by the time u finished reading this post. the pics should be able to finish loading. be patient. =D ]]

sorry for being lag. BUT PROM SIMPLY RAWKS. really. omgg. hell loads of fun. exultation. altho it falls on 25th. yarr like 25th. -.-

lets see. friday morning. i woke up REALLY REALLY EARLY to get ready. cuz theres photoshoot at 12. but dont ask me why. but i reached there at like 1 15. =x so late. reached there and the make up artist started doing the make up and the hair. then started the shoot. the camera man`s kinda ... i dunno. ask ppl to do queer poses. okays then changed outfit. a total of 3. one sch uniform. one princess dress. and one prom clothes. yea going to collect the photos on 30th. okay so anw cabbed down to crown hotel.

on the way pearl n me dropped off at far east. i did manicure and pedicure. PINK. i dunno why ppl define pink as THE BIMBO COLOR. or is it? lol wadeva. i like it. it took v long thats why we were late for prom. ahh. reached there. saw so many ppl. EVERYONE WAS SO GOOD LOOKING. really. then went up to hotel room first to put our belongings [oh ya manage to get a room the last min. thanks claud (= ]. touched up and went to ballroom. stayed outside and took many pictures. many many. so went in and the whole thing started. the emcee was high. the food was kinda shit. but the people were high. started with video playing. class by class. lol. yea and alot alot of pictures. then had games. lp the funny girl sprinted onto the stage just becuz *erhem [NO I DIN SAY IT WAS KELVIN] was up on stage. then our whole table was like shouting "LIPING WANTS TO DANCE WITH KELVIN!". haha. they were asked to dance v hot dance. and the very-bashful lp ran off the stage. INTO THE TOILET. [ why of all place a toilet? -.- ] but it was so darn LOL. everyone was like roaring with laughter. LOL. and hmgc* thot she looked like liang po po. as in the way she ran. ok nvm! shes freaking comical. then later kelvin started dancing. and he sort of stripped. hmgc* shouted "LIPING VERY SHUANG!" LOL. and she was hell paisae.

then had crowning of mr and ms nan hua. BENJI WAS NOMINATED FOR MR NANHUA! then it was chosen thru screams. damn it man. stupid ben made us screamed like mad. REALLY MAD. and he still lost. -.- and i lost too. I LOST MY VOICE CAN? and my blardie throat hurts. thanks hur BENJAMIN TAN. ok after that was dancing time. guess it was the highlight of the whole party. wad can i say. EVERYONE WAS SIMPLY H-I-G-H! =DD really really really high. the DJ started playing those rocking music and whole sec 4s went up on stage. to shake. woah. i realised our sec 4 batch can really shake their arses man. lol. both the guys and gals. total coolness. then the disco light came. the smoke appeared. the music went louder. and the people went mad. shake shake shake! sing sing sing! scream scream scream! and it was darn super packed. and its like when u danced u would definately hit someone next to u or get hit by someone. yarr like touch here touch there. but of cuz its accidental. as in. really squeezy wad. and nobody cares bout this kinda thing. just continued dancing to the beat. someone was beside me most of the time. haha. so wad does it mean. i dunno. hmgc* should know yea. =x lol. and hmgc* kept pushing me to people! first to him and then to my ex. lol. ohh yes theres this once during photo taking when pearl the VERY THOUGHTFUL GIRL pushed me to my ex and i almost fell on him so pearl held me and guess wad. the tube i was wearing ALMOST dropped. LOL. uhh stop laughing i said ALMOST. but i seriously think i zao geng. okay thx hur. haha ok anw back to the dance floor. everyone was jumping on stage and flinging our hands in the air and shaking our arses. the DJ was like "NO JUMPING ON STAGE PLS!" but like DUH. we continued. =D everyone was like on drugs or sthh. seems like we were more to clubbing away then dancing. haha. ohh and im so sorry to whoever i stepped my heels on. i know its kinda painful. i mean VERY. since its so thin. =x SORRY! cant see who was it. but i know i stepped on alot of people. haha. oops. but im very proud of myself to be able to dance on those heels. =DD pro me. later everyone staring forming toot toot train and jumping around like mad. its like everyone just any o how find someone near you and tapped the shoulder and form the trian. so it becomes longer and longer until the whole train was form. and went round and round with everyone tagging and jumping around. awesome. i was v high and pearl sudd pulled me away to take pic with Zaewe. and i think i was sweating like mad so apparently the pic would turn out shitty. LOL. nvm. then they started making fun of us. blah blah and later we went to dance. LOL. darn funny. merry go round. deprived childhood. =x haha. then the DJ was supposed to stop the disco thingy and we were suppose to sing [WHAT THE HELL!] auld lang syne. as in everyone was so high and are we suppose to sudd stop dancing and sing. of cuz not. lol. so the very smart DJ skip the auld lang syne part and continue playing those western pop music. woahh. HIGH ALL THE WAY. =DD

THEN. a very anti-climax song namely TONG HUA was played and u can hear "OHHHHH!" from the crowd. lol. some went back to the seat. some went toilet. basically we just deserted the dance floor. lol. poor song. i was in toilet till i realised my sweat was gushing outta my sweat glands like those bees flying outta the beehive when u throw a stone at it. lol. i dun even realise i was so sweaty when i was on the dance floor. shows how into-the-whole-thing we were hur. =D then went back to the ballroom. took loads of pics again. smile until so spastic le. LOL.

so the whole thing ended. and most ppl left. left a few ppl in the ballroom. THEN A FAIRYTALE HAPPENED. omgg. yes. it finally happened. then cried cried cried. luckily my make up was waterproof. hey thanks. it really means so much. yepp. it does.

after that left crown prince and walked round orchard. with my very agonizing feet. then those guys asked for number. -.o and they became v annoying by following. uhh wadeva. s`pore guys are getting despo. really. then we went back to hotel room. wash up. SLEPT! shuangg. then left a note for claud sher and aileen. told them to wake us up when they come back so we can decide how the 6 of us are suppose to squeeze into that king size bed. BUT THE NEXT TIME WE WOKE UP IT WAS WHEN THE SUN WAS SHINING ON OUR ARSES. okays i was the last to wake up. =x they are very irritating! kept trying ways and means to wake me up. haha. okay then nice them said that me pearl n lp were sleeping v soundly the night before so they din want to wake us up. and they had to sleep on the sofa and table. =x SORRY! thanks arhh guys. u all rawk. =]] and all very pretty.

ok so washed up and went taka to eat. after that went home. reached home took a quick shower and rushed to bed. slept from 1pm to 8pm. woke up. the moment i stepped outta bed i could feel the whole darn pressure on my feet. the aftermath of dancing in 4 inches heels.

so sad thats prom`s over. sec life`s over. dance`s over. we`re over. blahh. a new chapter of life. c`mon. look forward. yepp.

okays. all the pictures below. =]] ehhs those in the pictures if u want it just save it. u people rawkk. (:

!PHOTOSHOOT![taken ourselves, not the professional shots]

shot taken in school uniform.

inside changing room. with that lady helping me with this hulking costume.

yeah. finally done. difficulty walking.

zilian #1

zilian #2

zilian #3

zilian #4

THIS GIRL IS LIPING. lol.

four pretties. =]]

changed outfit.

looks like professional shot rite. lol. nahh. taken by ben.

benji and me.

THIS IS BEHIND THE SCENE. LOL. no la. we acted this out. too bored.

!PROM!

4o2// dudes.

4o2// babes.

HMGC* =]]

kiathow and me.

zr and me.

spens and me.

Foo and hmgc*

clar and me.

kel and me.

Siew and hmgc*

zr me kh.

KIONG hb and me.

chris and me.

nov and me.

Foo and me.

gw and me.

sunny and me.

bt and me.

niu and me.

yh and me.

me chris pearl.

zaewe and me. [SEE I TOLD U IT WOULD TURN OUT SHITTY. sweat all over!]

jen and me.

est and me.

harry and me.

koon hui and me.

qh and me.

mel and hmgc*

woah. had a very hard time uploading all the pics. u better be so grateful. lol. hmmm kaes. thats all bahh. im sick. grrr. so uncomfortable. still hafta go 4o2// chalet tmr. will be back on friday. take caree peeps. =]]

`and all of the memories so close to me just fade away.

so all this time he was pretending;
so much for my happy ending.

2005-11-28T14:24:00.000+08:00

yepp. i know i haven updated about prom yet. i will i will. cuz its simply too rawking to be ignored. yea im just waiting for benji to come online and send me all the photos. then i will update bout it with the pics.

ok so anw. went PA yesterday. CAN U BELIEVE WE ACTUALLY REACHED THERE EARLY? i cant. we WERE forever late. yea. then laoshi wanted me to try the gao qiao thing. woah it was darn scary at the beginning. but later slowly mastered it. fun. started doing some warm ups. and my muscles were like darn taut. can hardly stretch. then did some ballet stuffs. v cute. after that did the 1-and-a-2-and-a-3-and-a-4 dance. okays this is so not making any sense to a non dancer reading this. yea so burned much calories. at long last. had break. went to the open field for those gym stuffs. SUPER SLACK. then laoshi saw us slacking. so ask me to do shuang ren wu with yilong. that strong guy. so carry here carry there. fly fly turn turn [not making sense to non dancer again]. and SLACKED again. =x BUT later hardworking me n esther felt guilty so we stood up and moved our bodies a lil. did some [WOW?]cartwheels. =\\ got bored so we tried doing the one handed cartwheel for the first time. we succeeded! woos. but my legs sometimes straight. sometimes not. grrr. shall master it. later tried to learn the one legged cartwheel from keelui. failed terribly. therefore i define that as IMPOSSIBLE. i dont know how the guys did it. went back studio for debrief. hmm having another DI overnight. uhhh. DI overnight. memories.

blah blah. dance ended. went to eat with jennie and the guys. tiong baruh [sp?] market. hmm nice. but its STUFFY. very very. reached there i din really talk. =\\ dunno. i just dont really feel like talking. preoccupied with something i heard at PA just now. no i din say its ur fault. and no. im not trying to make it seem like it is urs. im just pissed with those freaking things u`ve said. to me. to your friends. which are all aint true. you jolly well know who you told. the dancers. AND. it doesnt take more than two seconds to delete that stupid pic. yarr. so u can just delete it.

reached home at like 1030. took a bath immediately. cant stand the smell of the smoke. then went to my bro`s room. and chatted with him. told him alot of things. yea he rawkk. wanted to talk more but he`s got sch the next day. so told him to go slp and i went back to my room.

toss and turn. toss and turn. toss and turn. finally took out my mp3 and listen to all those songs. thought about alot of things. wah lau. darn shit. finally after like dunno how long. fell asleep unknowingly. din off-ed my mp3. woke up the next morning and found my nano went flat. O.o

and as im typing now. every inch of my muscle is in agony. ahhh. too long never dance le. i feel pain all over me.

everytime i look at him.
i feel so sad.

2005-11-24T22:30:00.000+08:00

LIM HANN BIN.

I KNOW WHAT YOU`RE THINKING. I KNOW HOW YOU`RE FEELING. BECAUSE I KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN SAYING.

BUT.

GET THIS STRAIGHT INSIDE YOUR HEAD.

IM NOT GIVING A FUCKING DAMN ABOUT YOUR OH-SO-FUCKING-PRIVATE-THAT-NO-ONE-IS-SUPPOSE-TO-FUCKING-INTERFERE-LIFE FROM THIS FUCKING MINUTE ONWARDS.

OVER POSSESSIVE?

NOT ANYMORE.

2005-11-22T16:47:00.000+08:00

HELLO! I FINALLY FOUND A DAY FOR ME TO BLOG. oh man. ive been out from 10am to 11pm EVERY DAY. and so. im extremely fatigued and my legs are [%*@^#%!*#] killing. but nvm! hmgc* got our prom clothes already. PRO US. =D hmm wad can i say bout our prom clothes. the theme for this yr prom is RETRO but apparently hmgc* is going with our own liking. =D the five of us are seriously going in diff theme. LOL. and then we named ourselves VARIETY. -.o how crapp. haha. but i doubt anyone will turn up in retro. so yar. okayys. and hmgc* just signed up for a photoshoot that costs 500 bucks. lol. cool rite. will post those photos after my prom. yea and we also engage our own professional hairstylist and make up artist for prom. woots. i cant wait for prom!

lets see. FRIDAY was the holy day of liberation. sec 4s were like cheering like i dunno wad. me pearl n benji tore all our entry proof in minute pieces and threw it down from the six storey. they went falling down like snowflakes. frigging frigging chio. =]] and then later. i shan say what happened. LOL. ((x okk anw. we went bugis at like 6 30. haha. on our way theres this freaking m_lay guy and his friends. that bastard just stretched out his fugly hands and BOO! obviously i was stunned. then i hid behind pearl and screamed. my heart palpitated like how ur heart would when ur crush appear. OKAY THAT BASTARD WAS NOT EXCATLY MY CRUSH. i would nv have a frigging crush on m_lay guys [ ohh except the one in queensway. pearl! LOL]. these kinda m_lays are just pests to the society. so anw we reached bugis and it was so dark outside. haha. ate for about an hour. caught two pair of eyes spying on us. LOL. okayy nvm inside joke. then shopped around like busy bees that din stopped until we went home. reached home at 11+. oh god. bathe and slitered to bed.

SATURDAY MORNING HAD TO WAKE 8+? oh godd. how early. bathe and everything. then met up with the rest. we went to dye our hair! coolness. hehh. lets see. im brown. pearl`s red. lp`s reddish brown. ben`s brownish blonde. jo`s orange. we`re so gonna get chased out of school by lyesim. ohh anwway ben seriously look like an alien in the salon. damn it. should have took a pic and post it here. LOL. i bet u will die laughing. cuz we died at the salon. haha. after that we went harbour front. went to noodle hut and pig. and shopped again. pearl bought her SEXY top for prom there. but i din see anything i fancy so din buy. then took mrt to town. WALKED from heeren to paragon to far east. walked as in we seriously walked to every shops at every levels. dainty feet were giving in. lol. saw olinda. omgg she slimmed down alot. derrick was there too. and no they were not together. jo the pro ass bought everything for prom in that one day. lp bought her skirt and shoes. ben bought his coat. once again i din like anything i saw and so i din buy anything. i was darn pressurized cuz i was the only one who bought nothing yet. went to crown hotel [prom venue] to take a look. omgg the exterior sucks like shit i tell u. thats cuz i pictured every hotels in orchard to be like hyatt. nvm. theres silver lining. cuz the interior is not THAT bad. at least the ballroom is quite up to HOTEL`S standard. i mean with those red carpet and stuffs. wanted to book a room for that night but 25th all fully booked. omgg sian diao. then how. roam around orchard to spend our night hur. LOL. oh and saw hannqian and family in heeren. grr and my contacts had a crack which i so didnt know until ben observed it and my eyes were tearing for that whole day. the tears came to good use when we were shooting for MV. lol. nvm another inside joke. reached home at 11+ again. too tired to come online. bathe and turned in.

SUNDAY MORNING HAD TO WAKE UP AT 7+! omgg frigging early. unconsciously put the alram away and happily woke up an hour later. oh no i was late! went to bathe and met them in cck. shopped around again. bought nothing. cck kinda sucks. then took train to westmall. walked around. bought nothing. i was really pressurized again. din seen anything that captivates me. ahhh. finally we to jp. holy! i bought my top there. and i love it. =]] then we saw slyvester sim. ehh hes ultra skinny. ultra. not that kinda guy i will go for. after that ben went home. me pearl n lp went town [again]. saw meiluan on the way and asked her to tag along. so four happy girls went shooping. with sore feet. -ouch- hmm finally bought my skirt there. and my earrings. ohh man i love my earrings. reached home at 11. again. no energy left so bathe and went to slumber land.

MONDAY MORNING HAD TO WAKE UP AT 7+! again. unconsciously put the alram away and woke up an hour later. LATE AGAIN! damn it. rush like hell. in the end the rest were even later. haha yea so went miss loke`s wedding. omgg she freaking chio. really. B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L. many nhss people turned up. AND I SAW DALLAN! lol. then i keep shouting extra! to him. lol wow? cuz all sec 4s plus him SOLO sec 3. LOL. ya anyway we saw loke`s bro. omg exact duplicate can? its just like miss loke cutting her hair real short and spike it up. and he`s cute la. oops. the girls were like busy taking pics with him when loke is suppose to be in the limelight. haha. after her wedding went jp to get my heels. 4 inches! lol. nearly died when i first tried on. ok anw went jean yip after that to rebond my hair. 300 bucks. WA LAU. din expect it to be more ex than the previous one. ok wadeva. but their service is very good. talking bout service. LOL. pearl got darn mad at this guy. cuz he ask pearl to go away cuz he wanted to talk to me in private. O.o after that i told pearl what he asked me and all that stuffs and pearl was like "NO WONDER THAT AH BENG ASK ME TO GO AWAY LA!" then i was like no la MAYBE ... blah blah. and SHE ACCUSED ME OF SIDING THAT HAIRDRESSER. LOL. why would i! u silly pong pong. =D and theres a NEED to wash the hair three times during the rebonding process. ITS NOT THAT HE CHEN JI WANT WASH MY HAIR OR TALK TO ME OR WHATEVER THAT U KEEP INSISTING IT IS. lol. u funny ass. i love u! yea so went home. reached home at about 8. woah for the first time! practise on my heels. miraculously it took me only a few mins. hell 4 inches is kinda chicken feet. lol. i could even run in it! i ran for my bro to see and he asked me to be considerate for the people below. -.- LOL. okkay wadeva. watched super funkies. ADAM CHEN! omg omg omg. he had eye contacts with so many gals! man. he says he like big eyes girls. OK I SHALL GO FOR EYE SURGERY. lol. and hell no its a joke dont be dumb. AND FYI I HAVE SINGLE EYELIDS SINCE THE DAY I WAS BORN. STOP COMING TO ME AND "OMG KY, U HAVE SINGLE EYELID? I THOT U HAVE DOUBLE EYELID!" yea yea then i must go on about "NO ALL THE WHILE I HAVE SINGLE EYELID" then u go "BUT ALL THIS WHILE I THOT ... " and i have to repeat etc. tiring.

so today i finally got a chance to rest at home. IT FEELS SO GOOD TO BE ROTTING AT HOME THE FIRST TIME. read alot of blogs. saw some juniors blogs. wad can i say. im very disappointed in u all. really. i thot one was bad enough. then came the second one. then now the third one. dance had never been like this. i hope u all know who u are and please. please. dance is one big family. dance doesnt owe u anything. stop behaving like a princess. and dont ask me who im referring to after reading this. i wont tell u even if u ask. u know who u r. i like u when u are outside dance. as a friend i like u. and love hanging out with u. but in dance. as a senior of urs. i hate ur frigging attitude. you should see how dance was like a few years back. YAR A FEW YEARS BEFORE YOUR BATCH CAME IN. everyone was as ONE. and just look at those juniors hair. their fringe. ok im not saying mine is perfect. mine isnt i know. at least mine WAS. CUZ AT LEAST WHEN I WAS IN SEC 1 AND 2 I PINNED ALL MY FRINGE UP AND TIE PERFECT PLAITS. now wad. sec 1s and 2s only and i can see so many letting down their fringe. somehow i really miss elyse. she`s the best discipline exco ive ever seen. ok kaiyan cool it. theres still dance camp tmr. im sorry but im not looking forward to it already. no. not becuz the ones i mentioned above. some other reasons. AND given the pathetic amount of people who will be turning up. oh man. dance is not dance anymore. blah. AND plus i cant tie my hair cuz they`re now very straight and i wont risk it. but i dont like to be in dance with my hair let down. so maybe i shouldnt even go at all. but i am. with my stead. =]

hmm. i counted. i spent over 700 bucks for prom. as in EVERYTHING from head to toe. alright. this is so bad. cuz my stupid rebonding costs 300. damn. i swapped my atm card umpteen times. and im feeling uber guilty now. grrr. okays theres pics below. ALOT. dont die. =D

dont we look good together? SAY YES. =D

IM LYING ON ADAM`S SHOULDER.

LOL. spastic.

the pretty bride.

HMGC*. =]]

acting superstar la. LOL. cannot is it.

we`re married. =DD

pirate ship. -ahhhh-

i wish i could shoot u to death.

ahhhh. =]]

choosing his wife.

AND I WAS CHOSEN! LOL.

trying to seduce YOU. lol.

i seriously have no comments bout our hair color. =D

the sanbas. (:

pink blazor. i like it.

miss loke snapped her hair and spike it. LOL. jkjk. its her bro! ahhh.

jie lun laogong asked me to do this. =]]

adam dont be jealous. i saved u for the last. ahhas. YOU ARE SO HOT.

2005-11-17T18:57:00.000+08:00

ohhh.

what a nice song.

2005-11-08T23:01:00.000+08:00

hey i extracted these from ben`s blog [he was helping me scold that bitch] :

" to the gal who likes him that much but will always only remain as his best fren ;

you were once nice junior. oops your older than me but you dun behave like your older so nvm. you are so childish. i just want to tell you that. yes. we can walk all over the sch all ard the sch as long and as much as we like and you can do nothing abt it. we can walk into foo's office anytime we want. we can walk into the hod rm anytime we want. we can walk to where ever we please so wads ur prob with that? the fact that we are all 16 years old but we have been in nhss for four yrs but u have only been here for 3 yrs already entitled us the right to do so. nhss is not urs too. u dont control where we wana go. and please. dun be so bhb to think that we were staring at your face. -lips curl in disgust- you are not some big chio bu. please read the lyrics in kaiyan's blog =)

who do you think you are? interferring with his life all the time. you dun have any rights to do so. even as his best fren which is the futhurest that you and him can ever reach. i pity you. its such a waste to see. once an "innocent sweet girl" turning to such a monster. the way you are tryin to gain his attention is really disgusting. do you feel a sense of accomplishment to see the quarrel that you plotted, acted, and end with you acting by urself? you are pathetic. go join mediacorp la.. dun waste your talent in nhss. foreign talent. har. go back lah.

and please. please have some originality. think of your own style. piracy is a crime. its very obvious the way you try to act like kaiyan. esp the way u blog. how loserish can you get? still want to make flim. hahaha.. what a joke.

its not kaiyan's fault that they were alone in his hse

its not kaiyan's fault that they did the things you wish u did but didnt

its not kaiyan's fault that you get all so fucked up by reading her blog becoz she can type excellence

cos you really deserve it. you are so fake. really fake. you try so hard to hide the fact that you life revovles ard him. u try so hard to make him think that u dont like him. u try so hard to make us think that he likes u. u try so hard to get his heart silently. even if he cant see thru that we can. please. get a life. stop all your little acts which will get u no where. it was really funny to realise that u thought kaiyan will be jealous becos of ur dumb plot. wake up. u r two diff person in front of him and in front of us. who strated all this shit first? you. who diao kaiyan first? you. enough ok bitch.

"i love dogs 4eva" .. i noe you love urself loads!"

yea. after really i was really touched. cuz ben`s not that kinda guy who will say stuffs like that. u must really be a fuckass to make him type the things he just did. arent u honoured. ben thx. u really rawk. =] was very heartening to read that. thanks. for understanding. for all those words. i love u dude.

and yes pearl. thanks for all ur sms-es. your defence. your words. your everything. u really rawk too. thanks for calming me down and dealing with my super vulgar sms-es. i love u gal. its really nice to know u guys are just right here helping all getting thru all these shit.

jo and lp. thx for helping me. yea u gals know what. for telling me stuffs. for just leading me where to go. ai si ni men le. hmgc u all know what each of u all had done. helped me in everyway. i really appreciate everything. yes everything. =]]

2005-11-08T15:51:00.000+08:00

H A H A. rightt. i`m so so so jealous just because you went to say hi to him. like i cant? for your stupid puny brain`s sake, i can go right up to him and hug him OR even go up to him and smooch him right in front of your ugly face. so, which do u prefer to view? but i know you cant take that. i really know you cant. i dont want to see ur arteries burst. its disgusting. (:

if i had already held his hands, hugged his body, kissed his lips. AND HE HELD MY HANDS, HUGGED MY BODY, KISSED MY LIPS. [ plus so many other things i bet you dont wanna know ]would i be jealous just because a girl like you whom he told me he has no feelings to went to say hi to him? yea. HE TOLD ME HE HAS NO FEELINGS FOR YOU. i didnt plan to tell you. for i know you will be heartbroken! but since u think by saying hi you will make me go nuts, here i go. telling u the things u OUGHT to know before you go around bitch-ing and totally embarrassed yourself. oops! and the point is, YOU WENT TO SAY HI TO HIM. NOT HE WENT TO SAY HI TO U. hello, my indonesian maid can also knock on his door and like "HI!" am i suppose to sack her and make her go back to her country? LOL. omgg u are seriously so childish. so much for being the same age as me. tsk tsk. think before you speak yea? i pity you. i really do. and despise how lowly you can go to TRY to make me jealous. haha. listen. the word is TRY. im seriously not. wassup with saying hi to him? millions of ppl say hi to him everyday. wads there to be jealous about. woah u mean u can get jealous if one girl says hi to ur boyfriend? omgg i pity ur next bf. IF YOU EVER WILL HAVE ONE. given ur suck ass bitch-ness. i doubt so. so, still wanna prey at him silently? hahaha. in ur next life yeaa? must i remind u AGAIN the fact that he told me personally HE HAS NO FEELINGS FOR U. NOT THE LEAST BIT. he really knows how to make my day. =]] say the sweetest things i wanna hear. you sure dont wanna know. aww. ENVY ME? dont be. try harder? jia you. LOL.

u thot u were being cool. u thot u can make me go crazy. u thot we will quarrel after that. yeah ALL THAT WAS WHAT YOU THOT. haha! my friends and i just laughed it off like we`re watching a stupid soap opera which a dumb gal thot the guy likes her and try to make another girl jealous by saying a [giggles!] HI? wads a freaking everyday hi? i dont give a damn. simply because, ITS NOT AS IF MILLIONS OF PPL HOLD HIS HANDS, HUG HIS BODY, AND KISS HIS LIPS EVERYDAY. LOL. i know you dying hard inside. hey gal. u wanna a double death? i can grant ur wish, by showing you all the love msgs he sent. =]] or u can go check his phone for the love msgs i sent. but again, im afraid u cant take it. i know you cant.

ohh? you went to say hi? i thot you guys had a heated argument after that? awww. why? no guts to write that down. LOL. LOSER! hope that i wouldnt know? oops i didnt mean to know so much. you can TRY, yar once again TRY, to shut him up, so that i wont know all the things you so dont wanna me to know. x)

AND. stop trying to imitate me. quit copying the stuffs i do. the way i blog. the things i say. AND LASTLY STOP SPYING ON ME EVERY SINGLE SEC JUST BECUZ U CAUGHT A GLIMPSE OF ME AND ACT LIKE YOU`RE NOT LOOKING AT ME. PLEASE. MY FRIENDS HAVE EYES TO INFROM ME. wadeva is it. you wont be like me. YOU WONT GET HIM TO LOVE YOU. [psst! take it easy WOR. cheerios.]

ur dumb entry makes me laugh. H A H A H A. =DD i need him to calm me down. i shall call him now. =]] thanks bitch. oh yes. theres a new song in town. need some intro? here u go. refresh this page and it will start from the beginning. SING IT! after u have learnt u can come sing it to my face. LIKE HOW HE SANG -HUI DAO GUO QU- TO ME. awww. sorry if i made u jealous again.

conclusion :

-my jealous factor [ ZERO! aww loser! nvm. i can always give u certificate of participation for trying VERY VERY HARD]

-your jealous factor [ lets see. hmm too many digits to be written down. AND I DONT EVEN HAVE TO DO ANYTHING LIKE HOW YOU FRANTICALLY DID. lucky me. ((= ]

OK! I'm a cheerleader now!

U.G.L.Y.

You ain't got no alibi you ugly!

Eh! Hey! You ugly!

I saw you walking down the street just the other day

I didn't see your damage from that far away

I should have got a clue when the kids started screaming

You walked up to me with your buck teeth a gleaming

Your hair is all frizzy and your face is a mess

I thought it was a sack but it's your favorite dress

You hurt the trees feelings and the birds all flew

I don't mean to insult you

Oh wait! Yes I do!

Your teeth are yellow, they're covered in mould

You're only fourteen [sixteen for gods sake] you look a hundred years old

When looks were handed out you were last in line

Your face looks like where the sun don't shine

Did you fall off a building and land on your head?

Or did a truck run over your face instead?

There ain't no pill, cause you ain't ill

You're ugly!

U.G.L.Y

You ain't got no alibi you ugly!

Eh! Hey!You ugly!

What you really need is to wear a mask

And book that plastic surgeon fast girl

You're scary! You're hairy! I heard about you

You're the main attraction at the city zoo

You're so fat and ugly with a belly full of flab

When you wear a yellow coat people shout out cab

(Heh You'r funny)(I Know)

You got eyes like a pig and your nose is big

And with hair like that you should be wearin' a wig

Uncle Fester remember him?

I never knew that you had a twin!

You can't disguise your googly eyes

In the Miss Ugly pageant you win first prize

Yo mama say you ugly!

You ugly!

U.G.L.Y

You ain't got no alibi you ugly!

Eh! Hey! You ugly!

Quasimodo

Camel breath

Squarehead

-Ugly!-

Chicken legs

Pig face

Chin like bubba

-Ugly!-

Fish lips

Toad licker

Poindexter

-Ugly!-

Spaghetti arms

Limp butt

Freak show

-Ugly!-

U.G.L.Y

You could make an onion cry!
U.G.L.Y

Like an alien chased by the F.B.I.!

U ain't got no alibi

Ugly!

2005-11-06T12:31:00.000+08:00

i dont need stuffs like that one day before my majors.

`again.

`its not as if time means EVERYTHING.

` anyway its slipping away every single second.

2005-11-06T00:03:00.000+08:00

he says my posts are too obvious. uhh. so im deleting some posts. yepp hes right. cuz theres 6 dangerous ppl reading this.

o1)` the girl who used to like him. and like. maybe still like him? i dunno.

o2)` the girl whom i think likes him. nahh im sure. very sure. =( and shes chio.

o3)` the girl whom i believe still likes him. but denied when i asked her. becuz obviously ... uhh.

o4)` the girl who`s quite close with him. and got attracted to him?

o5)` the girl who`s not very close with him. but still. like him. O.o

o6)` the bitch who likes him VERY VERY MUCH but refuse to let anyone knows becuz she lost but im sorry its freaking obvious cuz of the frigging way you`re probing about us. and went round bitching like you so dont give a damn. H A H A. im sure. sorry if u came across some things that you dont wanna see in my blog. okays i will try to be more careful with my entries next time. you fugly bitch. (:

so. he says i must be really considerate to them. yepp i will. or else she/them will go bonkers and heartbroken. BUT still hafta act like they dont care. its a very bad feeling so i shall listen to him and be considerate. =]]

yes. yes. yes. yes. no.

))=

2005-11-04T01:05:00.000+08:00

HELLO! ANOTHER HAPPY DAY! =DD ahhh. my life rawks. despite the intimidating stack of work for me to drill into my already-gonna-explode-brain for the Os. but nvm. being the buoyant = optimistic me. i realise that Os will be over very soon! yeahh. like 2 more weeks. seriously its not that far. oh ya. i forgot to mention that im very looking forward to the star awards too! i dont know why. hehh. just love to watch it. MAY ADAM CHEN AKA MY DA SHUAI GE WIN SOME AWARD. but its not fair. he din really act this year. aiya c`mon just give him a prize for being so handsome. LOL. see, thats a very good reason to stay in Spore. i know theres such thing called tape. but i prefer live. =]]

now im very hesitant about rebonding my hair. you see. after u rebond u cant tie your hand for like at least a month. BUT. even if i get darn kiasu and rebond right after my Os, i have to tie my hair 5 days later cuz theres dance camp! how how how. even if i tie pony tail it will still affect. i mean. 287 bucks ok. =( and i cant rebond my hair after dance camp cuz that very night is my prom. and fyi my rebonding takes a freaking 6 hour. i totally cant get ready for prom in one hour kaes. ahh. so wad. am i suppose to rebond my hair after prom? O.o lol. ok MAYBE i will. i dont have a choice.

AND. last day of Os = 18th = dance prac. should i be a very nice senior =x and go vist them? i know i should. haha. but i hope i can also! like how i totally miss dance? yea but hmgc* is suppose to go town to shop for prom clothes! cuz we only have a pathetic 4 days to get everything ready from head to toe. 4 DAYS YOU KNOW! u might as well ask me to appear in a rag. -.- LOL. not funny. aiya then how? see see see. this ' dance and prom clashing' issue is a very big headache.

we talked to bernedette lim on the phone just now! omgg. lol. but shes very nice. and her laughters like no comments. she goes HAHAHA! -silence- HAHAHA! -silence- HAHAHA! -silence- yarr u imagine. loll. and she doesnt know how to use a conference! its like he called her first. then i called her. she helplessly went "KAIYAN! WHY ONLY GOT YOU ON THIS LINE? WHERE IS HE? I DUNO HOW TO USE MY HP!" omg i was laughing like hell. then imma like "ehh u just press options then look for conference and press can le" -after 5 secs three of us were connected- she goes "OMG! I LEARNT SOMETHING NEW FROM KAIYAN TONIGHT! HEE HEE HEE! KAIYAN GIVES VERY CLEAR INSTRUCTIONS! HEE HEE HEE!" -.- haha wthh. shes darn entertaining. to think i was telling him before that that im very afraid to call B lim. LOL. shes so nice. =] understanding.

oh yea. do u know my daddy loves me? LOL. he puts my childhood photo that i was licking a lollipop and wearing a princess gown as his hp`s wallpaper! LOL. he thinks that i dunno. and i think hes planning to keep it from me cuz hes to shy to admit how much he loves me. LOL. i shall go disturb him tmr. HEHHS. evil daughter.

BENJI OH BENJI. YOU BETTER BE SO GRATEFUL TO ME. =DD

hmm i realise my blogskin is opaque. so my pics cant be seen clearly. so im gonna change my blogskins after my majors cuz i have a lot of pics to post! =D

its 1 21 midnight now. yu le bai fen bai! shit i think it started. go watch le. bye. i love youuuuu. =]]

2005-11-01T23:30:00.000+08:00

i know u are dying to buy this shirt and wear it when we go out. awww. LOLL. -blush- okays im super irritating.

HAPPY HAPPY DAY today. =DD i know im darn irritating. always say im blah blah but i dont say why. hehhs. but hello. who cares what you think. i cant expose much. so many people that i dun even know are reading my blog. irritating. right evil aud? haha we dont care bout stupid people like them. oh yes i love aud anw. =] and shana too. hehhs. i very honoured to be in ur blog. yes yes. thanks. ((: haha so gan dong i msg u at like 4 midnight. LOL. -muacks-

im so excited about my life suddenly. haha. i cant wait for O levels to be over thats it. the things following which are the ones im darn looking forward to.

!PROM NIGHT! [ which means loads of shopping + vanity fair]

!DANCE CAMP! [ miss all those people there! ahhh. ;) + crying]

!HOTEL WITH HMGC*! [ woots. havoc. LOL. ]

!GOING JAPAN! [ still deciding if i should go. but i wanna stay in spore very much. BUT I WANT TO HUG MICKEY AND MINNIE! ]

!REBOND HAIR! [ like finally. ]

!3 MONTHS JC! [ not to study. just go there have fun and make friends ]

!SHOPPING! [ oh yes i love this. =DD ]

!DYE HAIR! [ with highlights. yeahh! ]

!GOING BACK TO PA! [ miss those people too. ;) ]

!NOT SUPPOSE TO SAY! [ weihong says i must be a good girl and keep it to myself. ok! -grins-]

i duno wad else to say. hmmn. very tired today. yesterday smsed with weihong until 4 midnight. zzz. haha hes gonna sms me again and say he sees his name in my blog. O.o but hes a very nice person to chat with. yeaa. =] and wah tuck kept calling at the wrong time and i din answer. oops. i think hes pissed le. haha sorry la!

two weeks ago my beloved tutor was very sad because her boyfriend broke up with her. she had no mood to teach me so we ended up chatting. =/ i had to put down my pen and start consoling her. ok. two weeks later [today], she and this guy whom she self claim look like wilber [i got so pissed off. LOL. and i bet he so doesnt look like wilber] got together and shes VERY VERY ECSTATIC she cant teach! so once again i put my pen down and listen to her and her darlings` love story to make me jealous. but she failed cuz i`ve got better one than her. =x hehhs. ok. so like one week later guess wad? ITS MY O LEVELS! happy new year kaiyan! -.- anw she told me that a girl should find a guy thats older so that he can protect her. I TOTALLY DIAO HER.

my bro started calling me THE AMBASSADOR OF LIZARDS a few days ago just cuz the kind hearted me was trying to stop him from burning a poor lizard`s tail when the dumb lizard ran past my bro`s smelly foot.

ME: kor! why u burning the lizard! so poor thing lei!

HIM: u dont act kind lo! i know u dont like lizards too.

ME: -silence- but its still very poor thing wad! not the lizards fault ur feet so darn smelly right!

HIM: i dont care. i want this lizard dead.

ME: then just throw it down the building or sth la! why must burn it. omgg u look at the face! its like pleading u. let it free lei.

HIM: -thinks for a few secs- OK LA OK LA! i throw it down. but i think its still gonna die. 21 storeys lei!

ME: better than to be burnt to death.

HIM: woah! someone has feelings for lizards man! saviour of lizards! -starts clapping hands- ok mei. i shall call u the ambassador of lizards from today onwards.

ME: -roll eyes and walked off-

ok the previous paragraph was so so so out of point. anw he got himself a freaking chio laptop for no freaking reason and im so jealous! lol. i dont care. i love to pester him. he ALWAYS give in to my pitiful face. HEH. evil.

ahh. i think im so dead. u know why. i realised i dont drink a single drop of plain water 24/7. u see.

-when i wake up in the morning : I DRINK ICE MILO

-when i go for recess : I DRINK CARROT JUICE

-when i go for lunch : I DRINK ORANGE JUICE

-when i go mac : I DRINK SPRITE

-when i go KFC : I DRINK MOUNTAIN DEW

- when i go for tuition : I DRINK BUBBLE TEA
-when i go formosa : I DRINK THAT VEGETABLE JUICE

-when i go pizza hut : I DRINK PEPSI

-when i go ljs : I DRINK SPRITE

-when i have cramps : I DRINK WARM MILO

-when i feel like acting tai tai : I DRINK BIRD NEST

-when i go kbox : I DRINK SPRITE

-when theres a major exam : I SHARE CHICKEN ESSENCE WITH BEN [pathetic!]

- when i go seoul garden : I DRINK LEMONADE

- when i go fish n co : I DRINK SPRITE

- when i am bored : I DRINK HL CHOC MILK

- when im about to turn in : I DRINK HL PLAIN MILK

see i dont drink plain water at all! oh no. its scaring me. i think i will die young. very very young. =(( or go for kidney dialysis. then appear on nkf show.

BUT I STILL A VERY HAPPY GIRL. okay at least for now. =DD oh ya ben wants me to say that he rawks. -roll eyes- BENJAMIN YOU RAWKK. [haha u know wad i mean =p]

ahhh all my paragraphs have no connection. so random. i know! who cares. i like. lol. ok long entry. byee. =]] i love youuuuu.

2005-10-29T00:27:00.000+08:00

I`M BACK. =]

this very cute couple had a fun time on the bus today. girl was slapping guy`s face and punching his packs. guy has really firm packs anw. nice to punch. haha. but i think guy enjoyed it very much anw. though guy asked girl to stop hitting him by tickling her. and guy very much entertained girl by acting like its really hurting. loll. but guy, the girl`s not dumb you know. obviously she wasnt using strength cuz you know she couldnt bear to. awww. thats so sweet.

ENVY ME. =D

2005-10-14T21:04:00.000+08:00

woots. another rawking day. =DD yeah. hao kai xin.

today`s last day of school for sec 4. wahh. so fast. kinda bu she de and everything. but yea. everyone has to move on. in the morning cleared my locker. OMGG MOUNTAIN FULL OF FILES. then later had some JC talk thing. omgg. totally boring. zzz. i used to think ACJC guys are darn shuai. but after their slideshow. imma like O.o stunned? loll. me lp and jo were like discussing poly or JC better. better as in BETTER FOR OUR FUTURE. i tell you its a super hard decision. cuz we duno if in the future ppl get employed base on experience or certificate. its like come on. the streets full of university grads.

then had lunch. blah blah. shant elaborate. he made me pissed. or so i thought at first.

after school went to look for him. like finally. loll. and later i think i flew to the moon. loll. but my ass hurts. really. omgg. but i wasnt pissed anymore. =]] EUPHORIA.

went dance. realised how much i really miss dance. i think their ketchup dance rawkks. darn cutee! haha. i cant wait for dance camp. and like dance chalet. winston? dance rawkks the universe.

had problem going home with my BIG PILE OF FILES. everyone said i got retrenched. LOL. thx ehhs. wadevaa. luckily HERO LOUIS came to my rescue. omgg. he totally rawkks. he actually carried those stuffs to my house! wahh. i live in bukit panjang lei! i thot i was dreaming. hehhs. how can anyone be so nice. but he said he will get scolded by his parents for going home so late. O.o and i felt so bad. oops. anw louis if u`re reading this. THANKS. YOU RAWK. TOTALLY. =]]

reach home. just dump the whole stack on the floor. freaking freaking heavy. i cant imagine how louis carried it from clementi to bt panjang. NCC indeed. oh yea did i say i wanted to pack my room in my precious entry. anw i didnt. OOPS. loll. imma busy okays. grr. zzz. and now that i got more files thrown inside i think it will make a prefect 5* hotel for pigs. think i will pack after my Os. I THINK. after that received his sms. ahh! wronged him during lunch! oh no. sorry. im so fierce. =x

yesterday went mall with my nice kor again. bought losta things as usual. we bought two pairs of matching slippers from OP that i think are meant for couples. but we bought it anw. darn funny! oh man he rawks. HE TREATED ME TO JACKS PLACE. woots. then went to clear our library debts. guess how much? A FUNNY $107! i kept laughing after that. 1o7 bucks? O.o

wednesday night was connected to this conference by 3o2 guys. dont ask me why. they`re just like "call this number" wahh. so lame. loll. but kinda entertaining. funny people.

no more school days for us le. hmm happy thing is that dont hafta attend sch which means like waking up so early. but the bad thing is that im already starting to miss some people. yeaa. YOU.

actually i think this is a very pointless entry. i just wanna blog cuz today rawks! yeah. wo hao kai xin. =]] and this song rawkks.

as you danced in front of me;

that was the first time i`ve seen an angel fly so low

=]]

`5057 words letter.

omgg

im stunned too.

2005-10-11T21:48:00.000+08:00

today rawkks. SO I SHALL BLOG. [omgg it rhymes!]

yesterday din attend school. pon! loll. slept till the sun shone on my ass. then slack the whole day. woah shuangg.

today. came to sch late. yarr as usual. then hmgc was being lame and decided to pon lessons and find some nice place to slack around. so we took all our bags and left the class. ended up in 3o7 [dun ask me why] and laze around. sat down in a circle n started talking. then something so sad/embarrassing/dismal/awkward for someone happened. awww. felt so sorry to see that hopeful and incite face turned to such disappointment and awkwardness in a swift. how i wish my existence wasnt present at that time. to save you from all the embarrassment that i know u wished u could just disappear into thin air at that very split second. ohh. and sorry. i couldnt control my laughter. i tried. ~~i really tried.~~ but u have such entertaining expression [that goes like *ohh he`s there! let me give my best smile!* to *shit. its not him. its that bitch! she must have saw the glee on my face when i thought it was him! damn!* to *okok. now i must act nth happened and act seh!*] that could change so quickly. it so tickled my nerves. LOL. anw. hmgc were happily in our own lala land until classmates called us and told us teachers were looking for us. O.o wthh. they told the teachers tt we din come to sch today but Chee being the smart ass thought he saw me n pearl being late this morning. sian diao. yeaa so no choice went back to class. yea so hafta face Chee. we thought he would flare up [like he always does when we pon his PE lesson] but HOLY! he was smiling and talking to us nicely. ooo. and so we got away scott free [again] for truancy. anw. he claimed to be " A VERY HIP TEACHER " which i so dun wanna vouch for. i can even roll my eyes for you.

yea. so after sch went town. lp and me bought some girl stuffs. was so tempted to buy everything cuz they`re going so CHEAP. serious. i think Maybelline rawkks big. their products are cheap yet qualified. sort of made friend with this lady there. she`s called Zen [cute name rite. that suits her cute face and petite figure]. yea. she has great make up skills and taught us some. LOL. going to her for our prom night. yea. FOC okayys. dont play play. ohh and she said i look like korean. -.o and i told her i am wad! wa lau.

then walked around. miss-good-eyesight-liping suddenly pointed at someone and shouted "APE!" omgg. I SCREAMED. who would have thought we would meet again! i was intimidated yea. i mean. IT`S [HORRORS!] APE! the whole nation is terrified! so quick witted ben immediately took out his camera and start taking candid shots of ape. he was being extremely careful cuz if he`s exposed. i bet APE will explode and turn the whole town upside down. inside out. yeaa. seeing APE for the first time. jo and ben agreed that APE does look like APE [as in. yarr. horrendous kinda monkey]. of cuz we werent lying! pics below for your reference. anw. we followed APE around taka and she went to the basement again! i bet to prey for innocent kids again. haha. yea. but nth big happened. cuz i think she couldnt find any. yea blah blah. ended up in cine. ben did something stupid which i`m not supposed to expose on my blog. haha. but its kinda cute la. i know u`re beaming now. STOP IT. asshole. loll.

i miss BEYOND THE X-AXIS. i think its a great show with innovative plot. now this show that`s screening is darn boring. wads more they made QU YI WU turned from a hunk to a dunno wad. so sad lo! i dont even feel like watching. and with un-qualified actors like the one acting rui en`s mom [she`s so un-qualified i dun even know her name]. omgg i think her acting sarks big time and her almost-breaking-but-cant-seem-to-break voice din help much in salvaging her tarnished reputation.

tmr no schh! yeaa. gonna pack my room. i tell u. its in a horrendous state now. i think i can even use it to rent to pigs as inn. rightt. and i dunno if i can finish packing in one day. i seriously dont think so. thursday 4o2// is not turning up for sch! MASS PON. loll. cool. there better not be some betrayers. omgg. and friday. SEC 4 LAST DAY OF SCHOOL IN NHSS. omgg i cant believe it. so fast. everything ended. our secondary sch lives is coming to an end. we`re graduating. as much as we dont wanna live up to this fact.

writing writing still writing. zzz. soon. cuz we aint got much time left.

woah. preying for innocent kids. BEWARE!

LONG SOFT SILKY HAIR WITH NO FRIZZ! [cross fingers] *so attractive!*

that`s the closest shot we got of her. LOOK LIKE APE OR NOT! SAY YES!

`broken up deep inside

but you won`t get to see the tears I cry

2005-10-10T22:48:00.000+08:00

DILEMMA!

poly or jc?

grrr. everything was supposedly planned. but in the end. yarr. wadeva. -.o thx.

i`m left to decide for myself.

mature girls make their own decision! yeahh.

HERES WHAT PY HAFTA SAY [COPY FROM MY CHAT LOG] IN FAVOUR OF JC:

i tell u why! LOL. firstly, mostly neighbourhood schs students would be entering poly. meaning that the standard confirm drop.
secondly, the ppl u`ll be mixing with in jc is definitely smarter than those in poly. u wanna be taitai right? yar LOL.
thirdly, jc got uniform! dont have to fret over what to wear to sch everyday.
fourthly (however u spell it la, irritating =X), can save on transport costs!
fifthly, easier to get into uni.
sixthly, u shldnt go there if ure not hardworking. cos if u continue slacking(like the rest) u can forget abt goin uni.
seventhly, got pe lessons. can lose weight!
eighthly, let me think yar. hahah my mama told me that if u wanna give tuition right, the parents will usually choose the one from jc rather than poly. yeps. the jc de will be paid higher also.

HERES MY STAND ON POLY. SHE HAS 8 POINTS. I MUST WIN! :

can wear home clothes everyday! no need to fret wad! everyday can wear diff clothes somemore. WEETS.
can dye hair! [THIS RAWKKS]
irrgular school hours
can pon lectures [esp good for si-lian people]
less stress. cuz more slack. and this is good for the body!
no need run 3.6 for PE! [HOLY! i already have HUGE prob with my 2.4 ya]
more good looking people can be found in poly. less nerds. LOLL.
more choices of courses for a better future.
last point then i win le! oh no cant think of any. hmmm. ehhs. more time for boyfriend! YES!

after listing out the various points i still dunno where to head. how how. =[[ wait. this is one extremely good theory about going poly. u see uhh. lets say X goes to poly. and Y goes to jc. so after graduating X goes to work in. say like the ABC company. but Y continues his studies in the university. three years later. being a dilligent worker in ABC company. X is promoted to the manager pose and gets a raise! yeahh! this time. Y just grads from university and joins the ABC company. but as a start. Y cant possibly just join the company and jump to the manager pose so he has to start with [HORRORS!] a worker pose! -end of theory- my point being. its not the certificate. its the amount of experience.

but

IMMA STILL IN A DILEMMA! HELP!

2005-10-07T20:13:00.000+08:00

updating. cuz someone ask me to. LOL. yeahh i`m obedient. =D but i seriously duno wad to update about. so many things i hafta to restrict from typing. O.o uhh well. wadeva.

lets see. today. TGIF. yeahh no sch tmr. in the morning wasnt feeling fantastic. yeaa. no one seems to understand. nvm. manage to pon two periods of chem today. weets. cuz we were happily talking to Foo in the canteen and somehow FORGOT that lunch ended. ya rite. FORGOT. loll. yea we were talking bout dance stuffs. Foo was like telling the VP [wads his surname again?] how great dance society is. haha. he was like " NHSS=DANCE ". *beams* so shuangg to hear that rite. yepp. and i was telling Foo how much mr Low rawks the dance society and asked him to increase mr Low`s salary but he just laughed it off. -.o loll. he told us he like HAPPY VOLUNTEERS the best. he said he was like dumb founded or sthh when watching the video. yepp. he asked me to name the pro-est guy in dance. i named ******* and he was like "that one your bf right!" imma like -.o wthh. later on he named some dancers that he think are pro. some that are arrogant. some that are chio shuai. loll. so funny. yarr. and he said i`m not serious when dancing cuz i keep laughing and playing. LOL. i was busy convincing him that its that kinda super slack de rehearsals. Foo very k-po lo. loll. keep asking "kaiyan ur bf is a dancer right?" and later he took my wallet to see my pics. omgg! darn freaked out that he`ll see some pics he`s not suppose to. blah blah. anw went back to class at 2pm. LOLL. -class dismissed-

we were talking to mdm tan today. forgotten why but she sudd mentioned she has a friend teaching in RGS. suspecting she`s IT [rmb IT that so called RGS teacher?] we asked mdm tan for a more detailed description. and later we confirmed that her friend is [GASPS!] the ape we`ve all been hunting for! *HURRAY* we found IT! hehhs. yeah. nice show starting soon. =D

darn in love with -because of you- recently. kept replaying it in my NaNo. the lyrics rawks big.

my heart cant possibly break

when it wasnt even whole to start with

im forced to fake a smile, a laugh
everyday of my life

wah tuck was darn lame a few days back. he sudd called me in the night and like "wey. very long never talk to you le hor?" i was like O.o haha. i mean. the next day is like his eoy yarr? shouldnt he be mugging or sthh. loll. weird guy. then later chat chat chat until nth to say le he still dont wan slp so i taught him chem. woots. alkanes and alkenes! bases and salts! and i forgot wad le. but i felt darn pro that night. =DD but he says he thinks he gonna fail. *punch him arhh* waste my beauty sleep. LOLL.

wa lau. wads the point of planning everything and acting like we`ll go thru everything together after grad when there`s no intention in the first place. a conclusion that all human beings are selfish. plain selfish. i mean. the least one could do was NOT to act like the plan of heading towards the same future is really coming true. making me believe in the plan and setting my mind on it. galvanized and stuffs. but to later on realize that an individual plan is already set. so much for all the hi-5 and promises. rightt.

wenta jp after sch with hmgc. saw lotsa les n gays AGAIN. but its quite entertaining observing them. and i surmise that homos like to touch each others butt. or u call it rub against. ya wadeva. any gross words u can come up with. lol. and lp says in ten years time the ratio of [[ women:men = 10:1 ]] omgg! so outta ten women like only one lucky chio bu will get married to the man? haha. which also means the rest of the poor ladies will find a partner amongst the women and turn les! oh no. i better book my boy now and make sure he doesnt run away. LOL. =D

oh yes. and JUNE 2004 A MATHS PAPER 1 rawkks. lalala. x))

today. o7 oct. a date to remember.

`you were so young

i should have known

better than to lean on you

you never thought of anyone else

you just saw your pain

and now i cry

in the middle of the night

for the same damn thing

be honoured. =]]

2005-09-29T19:01:00.000+08:00

hmm. i hope u think u know who u r. cuz i know u`ll be reading this. yarr. anw. i`m not pissed with you like you think i am. when i just found out that you thot i am pissed with u. i actually was kinda shock. i mean. things happened like months ago? yar. its true that a few months back i was extremely pissed with you. i mean. duh. everyone single one of us was. cuz we came to a realization of the different things u said behind our backs to different people at different times under different circumstances. its like. wow. i cant believe u said u wished u were the one who reported the case of me n hb to the discipline committee. do u know how hurting it is to hear sthh like this coming out from my supposedly bbf? my bbf. ya. the only one who was by my side consoling me when i was talking to hb on my phone. but who silently wished he was the one who reported personally instead. like who in the world wouldnt be pissed? obviously i was. and by like calling jo the bitchest bitch. and pearl the cowardly member who`s always plunged by love problem. and benjamin the competitor or sthh. u caused all of us to be seriously pissed off. okays i know u hate us draggin out ur personal blog and all. but wad if u come across my blog and see some hideous content inside bout u? u cant exactly be feeling ecstatic rite? yepps. but anw that was months ago. and by now my clique has cooled down and i suppose things are fine now. i just dun get it why would u say benjamin and i give u THAT kinda face everytime u walk past us. just to clarify. we didnt. seriously we`re not that free afterall. and u know my face. when i dun smile. i look like super dao. cant blame me for that? yepp. and i cant exactly smile 24/7 yea? just smiling back at people who smiled at me first. and u say i`m pissed with u? O.o i know im like the only one in my clique that hasnt talk to u. that`s cuz u tried talking to everyone except me? uhh. u cant exactly expect me to be the one taking the initiative to approach u rite when its kinda obvious u were the one at fault? and izzit my fault u chose to pick people to break the ice but u din choose me? and i dun have ur former email. so its not like i blocked u or sth. i dun block ppl. yea. so anw. my point is. i`m not pissed with u. dont get the wrong idea. and i cant understand why u think i am. omgg. be honoured this entry is only for u. (:

`again. time after time.

2005-09-28T21:22:00.000+08:00

weets. i`m seriously loving my iPod nano. especially when i discover new functions. hehhs. =DD like games. contact list. note pad. calendar and stuffs. hehhs. and it provides lame game like Music Quiz. where they play the chorus of a certain song and you try guessing it. loll. how lame. comes in useful during boring days tho. haha. zzz.

hmm ytd was a darn funny day. went to benjamin`s house cuz he promised to help me with the iPod`s stuff. he`s pro la. zoom zoom and he`s done. and we spent the rest of the time doing sthh lame on the com. LOL. nvm dont wanna expose. then saw this chocolate given by someone. eeks. then i told benjamin die die he also cannot eat. haha. and he told me he never planned to eat it anw. what a loyal ass. =D he says he`s gonna give away! awww. so sad. then later benjamin wanted to chase us outta his house le cuz he wans to go to his grandma`s house. LOL. but me pearl and lp die also dont wan to leave. we love being total parasites. LOL. when he came out of toilet to get ready to leave the house with us. we pretend to fall alsp. haha clever him knew it was fake and the idiot ass took all our bags and put it at who-knows-where outside his house. but like we would care and obediently leave? lol. nahh. and he din came back after awhile. [expecting us to go look for him so we have to leave the house] but NAHH. we continued lazing around until the loser benjamin came back with all the bags and like " ok la! ok la! i leave this house to u all. DONT MESS UP MY HOUSE ARH! DONT EAT MY FOOD ARH! DONT WASTE MY ELECTRICITY ARH!" lol. we totally laughed till -peng- lo. what a loser. yea so he left and we had the house all to ourselves. lp being the irritating gal was dancing happily with benjamin`s keys and that`s when he suddenly return home to take something he forgotten. haha i totally laughed like mad again. ya we ate his twisties. and he didnt know. ok now he will. =x benjamin its not me! i din take it! lol. i just SHARED. oh yes. haha =D and i was just using ur com and blasting music aka wasting ur electricity. LOL. oops!

today. they started doing spot checks on the sec 4s during assembly to qualify us for O level? like wow? pls. it doesnt mean we tuck in today and we will tuck in on the real day. and it doesnt mean cutting our nails today and they wont grow back in like 5 weeks? wads the point. anw. i got booked for hair and nails. -.o

after sch went jp cuz jo need to get sthh. yeaa. after that we walked around aimlessly. lol. i dunno wad happen. but the four of us [ me pearl lp jo] went mad bout make-up and started applying all the tester. LOL. i help the 3 gals put eye shadow and they say it`s nice! hehh. *bows* thank you. thank you. =D

hmm. not everyone understands me like how much they claim they do. its not like he`s the only one who always cause me to be upset when im down. yarr. nvm. i dun understand myself sometimes too. o wells.

yeahh. my nice nice kor is buying new nike dunkk for me this sunday. =D cant wait. he rawkks mann. i think i`ll get him a black iPod nano in return. he doesnt like his creative anymore. -.o wait the prices don tally. LOL. nvm. his next birthdayy. im a nice sis. =]]

do you believe

i sketched these?

loll.

wont you just look at me

you`re avoiding my gaze

and it seems like you`ve changed
yes u have

in so many ways

it isnt fair

it isnt right

if its really gone

then tell me the truth

if its over

let me know

wont you speak to me

im just here holding on alone

but i really dont wanna wait anymore

if the feeling is gone

i dont need no apologies

im not looking for no sympathy

all im asking for

is for your honesty

won't you just give it to me

BABY

glad u took the initiative that day.

but today?

i just cant seem to figure out.

what is it that you really want.

2005-09-25T19:32:00.000+08:00

PRELIMS OVER! =DD

haha. nothing to be euphoric bout actually. its not like we zoom home everyday right after school to study. loll. life`s still normal during prelims period. like eating buffet after sch. =x piggs. ehh so yarr. now EOY`s drawing near. good lucks to those peeps out there. =]] jia you bahh. everything will be over soon.

hmm. friday. went with hmgc* to cine to catch a movie. jo went to meet MONK instead. haha. oops. yea watched the red shoes. omgg the starting already scared the freak outta me. its not the image. its the sudden blasting of the sound effects. hmm i dun understand the movie at all. i just got scared unknowingly. out of a sudden. =// and the shoe in the show is not red! its pink! -.- bright pink. wthh. the RED shoes? -.o but the dance in the movie is nice.

came out of the cinema with a headache. sian. still walked around. oh ya saw ALOT of lesbians in orchard. -.o very abominated. saw one of them hugging. then i was like telling the rest "omgg! she put her hands on her butt!" then the rest were like O.o haha then i was like "yar. u din hear wrongly. SHE put her hands on HER butt!" yar then the crazy clique started bursting out in laughters. lol.

then we went taka`s basement to pigg out. yet again. yar. things were going on fine until me pearl and lp were sitting down on a bench waiting for ben that ass to come out of toilet. we were seriously just sitting there doing nothing. except sms-ing. yar so we heard someone hurling loudly at this old woman whom we later realised its the mother. lets just name this person IT. cuz IT doesnt look like a female nor a male. IT has a built neither of a guy`s nor a gal`s. IT`s hair resembles a male. yet a female too. cuz its freaking frizzy an ant could just get lost inside the kingdom of maze. IT also wears unisex clothes with this high waist color fading jeans and yucky white shirt that hides the boobs flawlessly which its an impt factor to ITs sexual identity. IT also has a set of ugly black thick bushy eyebrows that seem to have nourished with some fertilisers. okays enough of the description. anw u get my point. transexual. okayys la. i tell u the truth. we know it`s a woman cuz i saw her in the ladies. =x BUT i still wan to name her IT. you`ll know why shortly. yar. so it was hurling at the top of it`s voice at its mom. "YOU SON OF A BITCH! YOU DONT TRY TO FUCK ME UPSIDE DOWN! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUR FUCKING BLADDER!". totally exploded. like there`s no one in taka. fyi. its like 30+ while its poor mum`s like 70+. how totally brutal can it get. yea so we were watching. duh. like the whole world is? so just as it was bout to walk away with it`s mum. it suddenly turn back and walk towards the 3 of us. it glared and pointed at us and screamed at the top of its voice like there`s no tmr. "WHATS YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM? DONT TRY TO FUCK MY MOTHER UPSIDE DOWN!" and we were like wtf? we dun even know your mum. so it just kept ranting on. like we abuse its mum or sth. yea so i thot it was insane. so i kept quiet cuz ya. its poor thing enough to be a bonker. i just let it go on with wadeva it wants to say. BUT. when it hurled "DONT MESS WITH ME! I`M A FUCKING RGS TEAHCER! DONT TRY TO FUCK WITH ME!" i totally lost my cool. *pui!* u blardie hell call urself a teacher? ya a teacher who goes around cursing vulgarities at innocent students just hanging in orchard cuz its wow! after their prelims? since it can swear at that darn volume that makes everyone turn. we can too. =]] yea wads the big deal if you can say fuck? like we cant? ya i know we`re in sch uni but seriously we cant just sit there and let it act like we`ve murdered your mom. sorry yea but we shouted back. "FUCK YOU BITCH! WHAT DID WE DO MAN!" so it was like "YOU DONT TRY TO FUCK WITH ME! WHAT DID YOU DO? YOUR HANDPHONE!" -stunned- wtf? handphone wad? hello? like we`re just sitting there sms-ing? so we shout back " WAD HP?" and then she went "YOU DONT FUCK! YOUR HP! YOU DONT TRY TO FUCK MY MOTHER UPSIDE DOWN!" -.- we were like yar. we get ur point. handphone. sO? explain WHY. what is wrong with our poor hb? yea. blah blah so it went on using alot of the f words non-stop. in the end it left in expedite. we were seriously p-i-s-s-e-d. yeah we as it left we shouted "FUCKING BITCH!" at it. and hell. it turned back and marched towards us again. -.o yaya. so the f word exploded like some fireworks in the air again. here there here there. its blardie darn saliva spurted on pearl and lp like some holy water. *pui!* so there`s this huge commotion AGAIN. it was shouting at us. we were shouting back at it. wthh. it finally ended when the loser-ish it went away. muttering sth under its breath. wad a loser right. loss for words i bet. all it does is to use the f words to construct sentences with make no frigging sense. damn it. yar i mean damn IT. and please. look at it`s own figure. not hour glass. nor masculine. it just looks like an ape. if it wanna fuck us. i`m sorry. we dont wanna fuck u back. thx. u dont think u look like an ape u can win okays.

haha. was so pissed after that i forward the same msg to the whole world. stupid dallan was like "wah cool! i wan to meet her! my idol!" yar or sth lidat. lol so i asked him to go and die. then some ppl ask me chill. some ppl kept laughing. loll. -.- but he was much nicer la. loll. he was like "where`s she? i help u punch her!" wahha. then i was like "i wan to slap someone now!" den he say he let me slap him. hehhs. oops.

then saturday. went escape theme park. with hmgc* again! but sad. jo din come. yarr. we sat all the rides except those kiddy ones. lol. screamed until sorethroat. blahh. lol. we were like screaming *whoever* SUCKS! then *whoever* RAWKS! lol. darn funny. my fave was go kart. played three times. wahha. i came in first for three times! *bows* =DD lol. first time i won this guy when he was first to go? haha. loser. then he like so sia sway cuz his friends boo-ed him. lol. den second round another of his friend wanted to cut into my lane. then i bang him away and happily drove off! haha. then i can hear his voice fading away at the back. "oei! the one in front. slow down la!" lol. then i was laughing like mad. in the end i won. he gave me a thumbs up sign. lol. i was like O.o dont act nonchalant. haha. so in the end. *blah blah* stupid pearl ben n lp did not help me. they went to help the guy instead. lol. thx yar? they totally zoom to the exit. leaving me and the guy at the back. -.- and i duno how to answer him lo. haha. wthh. lol. hmm but i nv had good impression of guys who ask for numbers. i mean. kinda despo. yeaa.

hmm. reach home after 12. showered and everything but cant sleep. rotting on my bed. started reading all the sms-es from the very first one he sent. wahhs. cant believe how someone can actually change so much. yepps. read read read until almost cried then i stop reading and forced myself to sleep. zzz. was replying dallan at the same time. haha. then we talked bout the other time when we had dance at bv and stayed overnight. nice memories. and that idiot dallan. kept rubbing salt into my wound. lol. ass.

today. 25th! =// acted normal. yarr. we went bugis. kinda sian. just walk here walk there. my legs were giving in. anw bought a new mp3! woots. iPod nano. came out one week only. i love the design and all. super sleek and light. =]] yea. feel so shuangg. and guess what? the back is made of mirror! wahha. one big piece. =]]

siann. tmr go back sch get prelims results le. omgg. wish me lucks. i need every of that. haha.

`i`ll just pretend it doesnt hurt. =]]

cuz its just so easy to put on a smile.

25th.

2005-09-21T21:48:00.000+08:00

hmm. alot of words to type. alot of feelings to convey. but everytime i realise someone new whom i never ever thought will come visit my blog. i restrain myself from typing out stuffs i wish i could just shoot them off my mouth. o wells. guess its time to start a private blog. hmgc* dont worry. i assure u guys will be the first to know. =]] just dont leak it out. i will tell those whom i dun mind letting them read my private blog personally.

`oh. its 21st today.

`4 more days to 25th.

time flies.

2005-09-17T22:22:00.001+08:00

again! =D

lantern festival is such a joyous occasion.

everyone must celebrate it cuz its very meaningful. =]]

i`ll kill whoever who doesnt from this year onwards.

yeahh. happy LANTERN festival.

lol.

loser.

2005-09-08T17:01:00.000+08:00

wahhas. so long since i`ve come online. zzz. been mugging. prelims is coming! omgg. bahhs.

anw monday suppose to go SS remedial in the morning. loll. yea so morning wenta meet HMGC for breakfast. on my way there in the squeezy mrt there`s this obnoxious bimbo with those utlra big boobs who keep rubbing them on my back. wthh. -.o i think its its accidental but i dont believe she cant feel it. yuckks. therefore i surmise she`s a les. =D darn disgusting. anw after eating HMGC went to schh supposedly for ss lesson. but soon after we left before the lesson started. lol cuz we dont feel like going anymore. LOL. yepps. we rawkk. haha so we headed to lot 1. i finally bought the tinkerbell shirt le! so cute lo. omgg but its only for kids. =x no adult size. the tag writes 8-10yrs old. 124 cm. WTHH. loll but miraculously its quite big. o.O so nvm nobody knows. -shhh- yepps so i bought it. haha. paying tt time was darn sia sway. haha whatever la. 20 buckks only. after that we went to eat buffet sushi. YAR BUFFET LIKE AGAIN. shuangg lo. haha. we gorged like some gluttons. hehhs. eat and eat for hours. i swear i thot my stomach was going to explode any moment. and our plates stacked high up until a waiter came and "excuse me may i clear these plates? i think they are going to topple." LOL. freaking sia swayy. -blush- i think he had a hidden meaning like "excuse me. stop eating like some pigs or our restaurant is going to close down very soon."LOL. oh noo. im getting fat. its time to work out. hmm then later terrance came. i dunno how he can resist all the savoury on the table but he din eat a grain of rice. power sehh. haha. then we din have enough money to settle the bill (oops!) and he sponsored 20 buckks. hehhs. so nice of him la. yea thanks dude! =DD then on my way home i met this guy who is so darn familiar but i just cant rmb who! grr. he smiled and waved and i waved back. was so tempted to ask him WHO ARE YOU but like so bad rite. yepp.

tuesday we were suppose to eat healthy food cuz we felt so darn guilty of the fats we consumed that accumulated in the past few days` food. BUT. dont ask me why we ended up in KFC. =D LOL. terrance treat us cheese fries again. haha. thankks again. we look so pig la. our tables had zinger. chickens. cheese fries. whipped potato. coleslaw. pop corn chicken and drinkks. not enough space and we had to stack up. woww so much for trying to be heathly. LOL. after that ate mega head! [sponsored by terr AGAIN. rich ass.] omgg so long never eat le. darn nice. i love sour stuffs. =D then we came back to sch for eng. the darn side gate was locked and we thot we were being very smart to climb over it. humji me was stuck there for so long cuz i din dare to jump down. LOL. its freakish can! after like centuries everyone finally climbed over. then ...... *drumrolls* OM pointed and walked towards us! LOL. darn funny lo.
OM: who climbed the sidegate?
we: what sidegate? hur. [act blur]
OM: -points at side gate - who climbed over?
we: hur? what? we dunno. [still trying to act innocent]
OM: i know a few students climb over. and i saw a girl stuck there! [gettin quite pissed already.]
we: orh! that girl arhh! we saw her run away le. [ LOL. we all know its me la. but i forgot who thot of tt. darn funny.]
OM: no! i saw you all climbing the side gate! [very pissed by now i think]
we: what la! [still thinking we can get off by acting blur. LOL]
OM: DO YOU KNOW THAT THERE IS A CAMERA AND I SAW EVERYTHING!"

- oh exposed! -

we: - turn to look for the cam which was hidden behind a banner. like wthh. - oh.. erm.. we..erm.. [speechless]
OM: so i ask again. WHO CLIMBED THE SIDE GATE! [ sense of superiority reigns ] we : - one by one raises our hands -
OM: - took our student passes and left - [ i think he grinned. -.o ]
*end of adventure of 4 humji people.*

LOL. okay on a more serious note. i know its darn lag to say all these now. but i`m really sick of the hearing people talking bout weilian winning SS. like please! its over le stop it can! darn irritated lo. keep saying he shouldnt win and he wont last. is it his fault that his fans were supportive and voted for him while you guys being the kelly`s fans din? please yeaa. if you guys dont talk so much and conserve your energy to dial some buttons and vote for dear kelly. then weilian wouldnt have win. and u guys dont have to crap so much. typical singaporeans mann. talk big no actions. and wth are singaporeans arguing if his fame will last. i mean. hello? nobody did asssure that he will remain popualr until the day he die. so why are you people getting so agitated for? ok fine. if you people think that kelly will be more popular in future then let time proves it! nobody says you are wrong. so why make a big fuss outta it. nobody says that just cuz weilian won. kelly will become less popular too. and supporting kelly doesnt mean u have to HATE weilian yarr? liking kelly doesnt mean everything weilian does is crap too. seriously i dunno why some people are just so callous. i mean. he hasnt done anything wrong and who are you people to critisize him. what has he even done wrong. wow. by taking part in a singing com and winning it? dont be jealous just cuz he sings nicer than most of you. and please. if you yourself have not taken part and get a taste of those media fracas. you have no darn rights to comment. just try growing up being blind without knowing you are actually blind and realizing only at the age of seven. try growing up without even knowing how you or your parents or your friends look like. try living in a world without any colors. if you dunno what is it like then then you dont have the right to comment on someone who knows. [ i`m not supporting weilian nor kelly. i think both sing well tho. ((= but weilian`s childhood photos are darn cute! but junyang derrick rawkk the most. =D ] derrick going army tmr! omgg. wasted! cant see him in mac anymore.

i suddenly thot of a weird theory. if it takes two people to agree to stead. then why does it takes only one person to break? see. its like the guy wants to stead. and the girl agrees. so -congrats!- happy ending. but if the guy wants to stead. but the girl doesnt agree. so -boo!- sad ending. but when both parties in a relationship decide to break. yeaa they break. sad ending. but if the girl wants to break but the guy disagrees. THEY STILL BREAK! sad ending too! they will still break no matter if the guy agress or disagrees. u get my point? loll. bahh i have no idea why. but things just happen this way.

haha. wah not bad. long entry. the aftermath of not coming online for so long. tmr still going to sch to do maths. cant afford to fail our prelims. but i have a bad feeling tho. =// okays gtg prepare for tuition now. byee. jia youss sec 4s. =]] best of luckks.

WTF.

2005-09-02T11:05:00.000+08:00

my chem prac is seriously screwed up. ohh yes.
but. nvm. my prelims doesnt matter. imma not going for 3 months course thing anyway.yepps.
jia you for O level! *cross fingers*
weilian won superstar. ehhs duh. loll. no comments bahh. im on the neutral side. doesnt matter who won to me. =D cuz junyang nor derrick is in it.
ahhhs! junyang and xinhui`s wu ding is superb! so sweet. awww.
MY CRAZY DADDY VOTED 70+ VOTES FOR WEILIAN.
i was like wth?! he`s too rich. -.o
he acted liked he strucked lottery when weilian was announced the SUPERSTAR. crazyyy. LOL.
went to have seoul garden AGAIN today. omgg im seriously gonna gain that few pounds.
fun day today. =]] pearl ben and jo went mad calling me lao niang after ben peep at my bank account. -.o and announced it to the rest of them and i duno who`s the nice ass who started the lao niang thing. LOL
wth. such an appalling name. LOL. okay i think pearl started it. haha. idiott. but its darn funny when they acted out the suck up part. LOL.
we ate until our stomach exploded! hoho.
i love you guys. =]] *muackks-
talking to alyssa is nice. loll. =] NICE JUNIOR. HAHA.
hope the sec 3s enjoy their adventure camp yarr? its darn fun de!
omgg im missing it now already.
i want to change wallet! cant fnd any nice one to buy. grrrs.
pics pics and more pics below. DONT DIE. =DD

you shall have the glory of being in the first pic cuz its ur birthday. LOL. =D

love herr. =]]

jeff is such a friendly ass. =]]

lp jo pearl ben and me. we rawkk. =DD

ermm i din write those words. I SWEAR.

ermms. wthh? LOL. too bored backstage la. =x

wow nice background. -.-

HMGC. =DD

LOOK AT ADAM`S LEFT HAND! THEN LOOK AT MY LEFT SHOULDER! mwahaha. =DD

lp and jo. chio bu-es. =]]

i`m so greeny. -.o

dont ask me why dear bel likes to take pic LIKE THAT. LOL.

innovative pic. LOL. yeaas.

loll. yuhan? O.o cutee.

THAT`S OUR SPECIAL BIRTHDAY KISSES FOR BEN! be honoured. LOL. x))

jo n lp looks nice. me ben and pearl looks spastic. LOL. second row is cursed!

jo and ben. =))

ehhs what a fake smile. loll.

chio bu-es again. loll. sexy lp.

ahhh my neck! LOL. -.o

cant see i know. chose this darkest pic on purpose cuz u really dont wanna view our lethargic faces. =p.

once again we stare in silence
after all is said and done
only emptiness inside us
baby look what we've become
too far apart to bridge the distance
but something keeps me hanging on and on
pretending not to know the difference
denying what we had is gone
every moment we're together
it`s just breaking me down
nothing in the world
could take us back to where we used to be

all the magic's gone
there`s just a shadow of a memory

something just went wrong

cuz you`ll never see the tears i`ve cried for you.

2005-08-27T02:15:00.000+08:00

=DD im in the superlative mood to update my blog! my life rawkks like heaven now (except for studies maybe -.- ) and i love the nice people around me. woots. wo zhen de hao kai xin. =]]

25th of every month USED to be a very jinx date. cuz something very unfortunate between us always happen on that date since march. so i was dreading 25th like shit and the whole day i was fearful. at night i wanted to forward him a gd nite sms but hesitated. but just when it was about to turn 26th. i recieved an sms from him! i saw his name on my phone and i froze. and i got extremely scared. cuz remember 25th is a ultra JINX-ed date? but when i open the sms i was TOO ecstatic to think of anything. =DD the first thing i did was to go back and confirmed who was the sender again. i saw his name and the next thing i did was asking myself if im dreaming or something. i know it sounds stupidly dumbb but i just cant believe he sent that you know. cuz its like. been how long since his everynight-send-one-good night msg-to-me-habit stopped? i dunno why the hell but my tears started flowing. o.O i know its lame to cry over a sms. but its my first time crying for something jovial! and the feeling is like totally different yeaa. yepp after i calmed down i sms-ed ben and i screamed in the sms (he knows it when i SCREAM in my sms). LOL. he screamed back too! cuz something jovial happened to him too. =]] yea so we started congratulating each other and continued screaming in our sms-es and we din wanna sleep. haha. it`s really difficult to sleep that night. =)) i know all this sounds so ... but yeaa. u`re not me. you wont know how i felt. =]]

* everytime we dont keep in touch i feel lonely and sad. one thing for sure i miss you. thats just half of the story. hope another half is that you are missing me too. hehe nitex *
- yea. you know i do. nights. -

my friends say im v kua zhang to cry over a sms. yea i think so too. its JUST a sms. but its the person that matters. and the things that happened between us that matters. and the sms for assurance that matters. =]] an sms leads to so many things. wow.

okays back to today. did detention cuz of my attire again. wthh. lim lye sim. but it was easy job la. she`s bo liao. after that wenta my lao gong`s house to bathe and get changed. we were too bored and started HAVING FUN in bed. -.- JUST KIDDING LA! lame shit. loll. we were just taking pics. yeaa after that met the rest at clementi and we went town together. me pearl jo ben lp. =]] hmgc rawkks. ben treated us seoul garden to celebrate his birthday and we ate like pigss. hehhs. oops. had loads of fun and laughter there. cuz of this entertaining red shirt woman sitting beside us. LOL. nvmm. she laughed at my jokes. -.- then we took some pics there. upload them next time when ben sends me. hmm seoul garden rawkks man. oh yes SEOUL GARDEN RAWKKS. =x hehhs.

after that we wenta take neo prints. spend 40 bucks in all. =x but they came out really nice and we all love them. me and pearl planted birthday kisses on ben in the shoot. cheeks only la. nice pic. LOL. hmm see if i can upload it to my blog.
after spending a long time in the photo shop we finally left and we continue taking pic at the fountain outside ngee ann city! loll. it was already night time and we all looked lethargic. hmm after that as we walked we saw this guy reading tarot cards but we din try tho. hmm we should have cuz it may warn us of something eerie ahead in the night later. =// yeaa its really eerie. right hmgc? omgg. i dont dare type everything out in my blog cuz im ALONE in the room and its 2 o3 midnight now. alright im very freaked out now. = its really darn freakish and all of us were darn disturbed by it. grrr. humji me called my dad to pick me up cuz i dont dare to go home alone. =// but anw. i love hmgc loads. yepp. i love pearl! i love benjamin! i love joanna! i love liping! =DD life is wonderful with people like you guys. hmgc rawkks!~

okays since ben`s birthday`s coming. i shall be nice and dedicate this para to him. *listen up!* hmm. ben arh. our clique`s lao da! he gives commands and we MUST listen. LOL no lo you dream on. =p yepps but he`s a really nice guy and puts others before himself. he is loving his life right now cuz ... loll. yea ben hao xing fu sehh. hehhs. he is matured alright. and he`s very realistic. he doesnt believe in things like fairyland. *erhems* our neoprint? LOL. but he set up his own fairyland and it consists of only two pathetic members thats me and him! yeaa. in our own lala land. hehhs. but apparently he`s just fooling around with me. -.o he did tell me fairyland does not exist tho. recently he just told me to let go of something. but boy im glad i did not. =DD ben`s also getting lamer each day as influenced by me and pearl. LOL. he admits that too. he starts making weird noises in class all of a sudden and leave us all feeling bizarre. ben`s also popular with lower sec people and they gave him ipod for his birthday! how cool is that. yepp. ben also likes to burn pictures. LOL. =x hmm. me and ben`s telepathy level is increasing day by day too. woots. great minds think alike. haha. kaes so i wish you a very SWEET sixteen birthday hur? loll. best of lucks for your O levels and continue your endeavour of being a doctor. =DD i know you can de. lastly. i know you like the kiss i planted on you. stop smiling! LOL. but you can only get it again on your next birthday! loll. nahh jkjk. we`ll be friends for life and you better give me MCs in future for me to skip work! hehhs.
BENJAMIN! HAPPY SIXTEEN BIRTHDAY!
=DD love ya!

zai ni zuo you;

hai you duo jiu;

neng bu neng rang shi jian dao liu

your wrist? =// takkiare bahhs.

2005-08-24T18:58:00.000+08:00

hmms. people commented my previous two entries sounded very bu shuang? cuz there`s no HAHA and no LOL. O.o yepp i know but wait i wasnt bu shuang or anything yea? why should i be anw. and its not as if there`s anything or that someone for me to get bu shuang now that if i even want. hmm no la. just not in the best of mood these days? no. these weeks. yepps. at least not excited enough to be typing all the jubilant stuffs that make me end with a HAHA or LOL. my blog is getting humdrum i know. but who cares. i will still continue with my point form. and my no-haha-or-lol-blog until i feel there`s sth for me to feel ecstatic again. yepps.

sunday went out with my nice kor. bought lotsa new clothes n shoe again. he paid 70% as usual. yeahh.
lazy to carry all the stuffs so we cabbed home. my beloved bro paid as usual. darn shuangg. having an elder bro rawkks big.
how i wish i can spend my everydays like how i spent sunday. no studies. just shop shop shop. and kor pay kor pay kor pay. so shuangg.
so shall continue my endeavour of being a rich tai tai. yea yea.
spent sunday night teaching my cute di his chemistry and i suddenly feel like a chem pro. okayys i speak the truth. he`s only sec 2. =((
can u believe i used to get so cocked-up with the reaction btw magnesium and HCL in the past? i mean. DUH! but now i`m havin a hard time explaining to him. arghhs. drawing him the bonding btw ions thru the whiteboard on msn. funny.
got back ct results. wasnt good. hmm okays it was bad instead. o wells. time to really mug. and stop thinking bout useless stuffs.
i know i cant concentrate on my ct cuz of something that happened. i should really move on and stop hovering in the past.
my whole class of pro peeps fail geo. yeah happy new year 4o2!
do you know forests with the size of a soccer field get chopped down every sec? omgg. every sec! save paper kaes. nice citizen. =x
hmm. our aimless clique finally plan where to go after O levels. me pearl lp jo [maybe only]choose to go ngee ann poly. ambitious ben plan to go to SAJC. =/ but he can de lo. pro ass.
yepps. me and pearl taking business course bahhs. its kinda interesting. i mean i like doing work in that kinda 24/7 air-con environment and just type type type.
yepp so business course will ensure us a job in either the bank or the tourism industry [cool ehhs?] we din take geo for nothing finally! but i think i will end up doing banking. like that job since young and god knows why. cuz its very cool with the suit? -.0
oh yea. me n pearl even considered being air stewardess. -.o but hum ji us dont wanna risk our lives in an air crash. =//
actually leaving nhss and starting a new phrase of life out there is not that bad either. at least i can stop seeing faggots i dont wish to see in school. yeahhs.
my E maths paper got deducted of 2 marks cuz i drew my own graph paper. wow? they should even give me 2 sympathy marks the fact that i wasted time constructing my own graph yea? >.<
our clique talked to miss ong that day. woots. felt so shuang after that. -big grin- punching bag. -.o
thinking bout changing to a password protected blog after this entry. yepp. not a bad idea hur.
xiao zhu`s bod is so hot mann. tan toned tall good-looking humorous. pratically everything nice. yu le bai fen bai is super interesting with him.
oh yea shana saw ur entry. thx. hmm but i still dunno who is dancer. help me la. anw the person u say u think it is. denied. o.O
my horoscope says that me and my love one will reunite on the 23rd? oh yea right. i`m sure. walking pass each other like complete strangers is a form of reunion ehhs? yea reunite. my ass.
wow. nice pearl and ben totally pushed me for they-know-what-reason. -.o
very pain u know. >.<
anw ben`s birthday is coming. yepps. see im nice to help u publicize. yea ppl buy him gifts.
went formosa today. ben was recapping with me the past between us. us as in NOT me n ben. but me and someone else. yepp. was feeling so. yepps. i had a very sweet sixteen. yes its was a very SWEET one. really. how he helped me cook the food and fed me in seoul garden. the lame actions we did. the un-funny jokes we cracked. the bags of presents he helped me carry. the long time we spend in the salon. the neoprints we took. i`ll never forget how i spent my sweet sixteen. with you.
last monday was 21st.
tmr`s 25th.
nvm. no one will get me except him i guess. yepp.

sweet messages;
lame phone calls;
sweet drinks;
fun laughters;
warm hugs;
sweet kisses;

- gone -

2005-08-19T21:39:00.000+08:00

imma in love with point form. lazy me. =x

i know my blog has song and totally contradicted with my previous entry. =/ but i cant stand no music in my blog. yepp so inserted candy shop. sexy songg. goes with the pic on the left yea?
common test was uncommendable bahh. having a bad hunch. =/
din really have time for my E maths paper cuz i stupidly wasted time constructing my own graph paper using my own hands with pencil and ruler when i din know a perfectly COMPUTER PRINTED one was attached at the backk. uhh. kill me.
i failed A maths! arghh. but i kinda expected that la. cuz i din mug for it. and i know it. -shrugs-
maths really makes one goes mad. hell.
but rejoice! my eng ct got highest in class. woots. tyco la i know. and its not really that high. o wells.
nice grace sms-ed me that day. end up chatting bout dance stuffs. we realised dance changed alot le bahhs. yepps. sad case. i dunno how to put it but its just kinda different from the past? but anw nhds is still the best. now and forever. and grace rawkks la. sweet gal. thx for the sms. =]] i love you gurll.
and still i miss dance like ever. was studying for ct that day and i freaking cant concentrate. keep thinking bout dance`s actions i`ve learnt in the past. i know its ludicrous la. but they just popped up in my brain when i was staring at the book kaes. -.o god knows why.
i think i cant even split now. oh noos. this is very badd. a dancer who cant split. so sad.
5566 is so gay. i assure that fact with their new song. its so freaking cheena-biang okayys. sounds like some chinese new year celebration song. dumbb. think the song is called hao jiu bu jian. go listen. i think u will die. cuz i did. darn crapp lo.
maia`s chinese song is nice. i dunno wads the title. but its kinda doleful. she`s got sexy voice mann.
bad news! i cant keep my kittens any longer. arghh. parents` kinda pissed of cuz they got really mischievous. =x
was frantically looking for ppl to adopt them on mon night cuz my parents gave me a time limit. uhhh many wanted but their parents dont allow. in the end i duno who to pass to. was so frantic i almost cry lo. wthh.
but luckily nice winston suggested me to bring them to sch and he will me keep in 3o2 first. cant keep in 4o2 cuz B lim will make a big fuss. so hide in 3o2 first. yepp thx he rawkks.
visit them during recess lunch and after sch. their class guys were playing happily with them. heard that the kittens were out during maths lesson yea? o.O kept running and meowing around in class. cuties.
in the end a guy from 3o2 adopted them. thanks. treat them right yea? =]] lovelies.
i miss them running in my house now already. =((
wed junyang came back to nhss and the whole sch went mad man. seriously mad. esp when he just arrived and walked to the library. everybody went out of class and scream at the top of their voices. the whole block went mad yarr. (my class`s side. duno bout the other side) banging and cheering. behaving like some hooligans. i was screaming too. oops.
look from an outsider`s view and u`ll think its a ludicrous sight seeing six levels filled with people yelling. some even holding broomsticks and banging. -.- esp the guys. they di siao-ing la.
i seriously hope junyang didnt witness that. =/
B lim went bonkers too. not over junyang but the fact that she tried ways and means to calm us down. quite a hilarious sight. oops.
can hear ppl screaming contradicting names like DERRICK n WEILIAN. super funny. me and pearl joined it. oops. but all for the fun of it yea.
so during assembly he just made a short speech. getting votes i guess. but i mean its nth wrong yea. thats wad contestants would do to compete wadd. yepps. he said " i know dance in nhss is v good!" woots. was cheering after he said that sentence. yepps.
but still junyang is out. HAIS.
i dun understand why is junyang and xinhui out when apparently they did better than weilian and kelly respectively. i mean the whole world can witness that. wads the point of holding this competition then. crapp. 70% is too much for the audience.
felt so heartbroken seeing junyang cry mann. i mean. he SHOULD get in! did u hear his tong hua on wed. i swear its times better than guang liang`s. and same case for weilian`s. jy looked utterly prince charming in that white suit while singing tong hua. grr.
refuse to talk to my parents. im so bad hur. =x play play only yea. but the smirks on their faces when weilian got in makes me feel that injustice is done to jy. grrr. >.<
nvm. one day the audience is gonna regret voting for weilian im sure. not like i hate him. i think he`s cute in fact. but obviously a more facture fact is that jy is a more eligible superstar.
went formosa today. lay on my lao gong`s lap and really fell asleep there. so shaung man. slept until 5 sth. oops. =/ lao gong i love u!
i saw this couple making out in my carpark below. O.o wasnt on purpose kaes. felt so lightbulb. that gal was making that kinda "aww! ohh! uhh! woo!" sound. sickk man. i mean. choose a better place? a carpark? very hot lei! oh ya. they wanna make it as hot as possible. =x

i wish i didnt miss you;

i wish i didnt care;

i wish i didnt live my life;

wishing u were there;

i wish i didnt wonder;

where are u and where u`ve been;

i wish all these feelings would come to an end;

i wish my heart would someday feel right;

the way it used to be when you would hold me tight;

i wish i you didnt break my heart so sad;

i wish i you were always by my side when i`m sad;

i wish one day you love me back the way i loved u;

and my biggest wish is still;

wishing all my wishes would come true.

-shrugs-

i guess a blog has lost its meaning. i mean its suppose to be an online diary. and a diary is where you jot down your most genuine feelings and thoughts. and open just mean u post in online. but apparently i cant do it anymore cuz there`s more and more people accessing to it. refraining me from typing out those feelings that is lying beneath me and the stuffs that i really wanna tell you. i used to blabber all the stuffs i wanna convey to you straight out in my past entries. i never thought of the people who will read it. cuz i was just thinking bout getting my point across to you. you and only you. or so i thought. but now i know and therefore i cant do that any longer. i wish i could. really. cuz there`s still many many many things i wanna tell you. but i dont think i have a chance now given the present situation between us and you know how is it like. i know how well my recent entries just consist of superficial stuffs. but do i have a choice. cuz i know i cant type out my genuine feelings now. all i can do is to drop hints to you but avoid stating the main point that i wanna you to know and i hope you do but you never do.

and i have no freaking idea why things turn out like this for us. i wish i do. but u never did explain things to me. you never did try either. all i can do is watch and wonder. where the guy i used to know has gone.

2005-08-14T00:37:00.000+08:00

yeahhs point form again bahhs. simple and efficient.

new blogskin apparently. very simple.
took away music cuz matt says it disrupts the songs already playing in the com
i agree cuz kinda irritating when others blog have music and cant hear my own media player.
anw matt cheer up. =]]
o level oral was alright. could have done better i guess. but nvm thank god its over. the conversation part the question was " describe an incident when u wished you told someone something but you did not. "
first thing on my mind was bout you know. those love love stuffs. but apparently i cant say tt in like a national exam. so took quite awhile to think. =/
upset over derrick getting outta superstar. kinda expected la. sorry but i think weillian should be out. junyang is good anw. nice voice.
my parents are crazy over superstar. -.o more enthu than i am. they like weilian. they even wanted to vote for him which i told them not to. cuz i wanted jy to win. *shhh*
my locker is locked by the sch cuz i dun normally lock it. just leave it lidat. and great i lost my password so i cant unlock the lock. thx alot. cant even take my books out.
yuhan helped by kicking the locker and the whole lock came out. now cant even close. so now when the wind blows. the door swings and expose my whole locker. -.o pathetic.
rachel jia you for ct. i know you can de.
ppl like grace xj yj i cant tag ur tagboard. takkiare okays gals. i miss u guys loads.
dropped my phone again. new marks appearing. damn it. dont wanna change phone again.
omgg i dunno people actually read my profile. its frigging long. but erm yarr thx.
good luck for ct everyone.
i no mood to update la. im just writing pure crapp.
life is crap anw.
haii.
sick and tired of everything. wont give a damn anymore. i`ve tried. and i wont anymore.
sometimes its really nice to chat with someone u seldom chat xin shi with. then you can say everything u wan without hiding how you really feel. yepp. like bt. lol. smart ass and dumb ass. -.-
omgg thats my first lol in this entry. wadeva.

once again we sit in silence;

after all is said and done;

only emptiness inside us;

too far apart to bridge the distance;

but something keeps us hanging on and on;

pretending not to know the difference;

denying what we had is gone;

all the magic's gone;

there's just a shadow of a memory;

something just went wrong;

we can't go on make-believing;

nothing in the world;

could take us back;

to where we used to be.

i know that.

2005-08-09T23:47:00.000+08:00

" first and foremost i would like to once again thank my Saviour Lord Jesus Christ for everything he has done for me. thank you for guilding me through the pain, happiness, and sorrow. because of you, i have become tougher than ever. thank you! to all my fans everywhere anywhere : it`s been a long year. you all know how much i appreciate you and how much i love you. thanks for waiting for me. I AM BACK NOW! "

that`s wilber`s speech. OMGG! *screams* yeah you are back! i love u too! lol. pan shuai rawkks my whole galaxy mann. today wenta his autograph session. drag myself to wake up at like 5 + am to shower n get ready n stuffs. by the time i got ready it was already 7+ le. loll den rush to meet pearl. nice her woke up early to pei me to his autograph session la. she rawkks. thanks arhh gal. =DD u know how much this autograph session means to me. hehhs. yeah then reach there at 8 got ppl queueing le. yeah den later ben came. =)) nice him too. thanks! pass me the camera. yeah so we sat and rot there for like 4 hrs? camp there sehh. not badd. wilber came at 12 noon. he was late! but nvm. hunk is worth the waiting. he`s so cute n dashing! i almost died on the spot. omgg then he say he lack a gal in his life. *faints* so many gals were screaming la. loll. and he sang bu de bu ai and gao shou. shuangg gan. yeah then the autograph session started. suckks la. so many ppl tried to cut queue. and congrats they did it successfully. -.- was quite pissed off cuz the fact tt it was so hot n stuffy over there. but anw his signature and hand shake flooded away all the irritation. my left hand shook his left hand! ahhhh! i`m not gonna wash my left hand from now on kaes. LOL. he shall be the last guy tt touches my left hand. and he said " xie xie ni!" =D and his xie xie ni is like *shie shie ni*. that kinda ang mog style. LOL. super cool lo. everything bout him is so attractive. hehhs. no need xie me. you are worth it!~ hmm but the cd. erms wont be mine le. hen bu she de lei. =( o wells nvm la. worth it. ahhhh! WO AI PAN SHUAI!!! >.<

okay today is national day i`m suppose to like praise singapore but i`m here blabbling bout pan shuai. LOL. kaes la. erms happy national day? o.O yea watched ndp. kinda boring i think. =x except for the fireworks part hur? i love fireworks. i guess everybody does. =]] chio sehh. the airplanes flew past my block la. ehhs no comments. omg lemme say a funny thing. my whole block of 21 storeys consisting of 126 units but only one unit display ONE PATHETIC FLAG. super LOL lo. darn funny lo. dunno which extra unit is that la. but yeah one flag outta 126? =/ my block rawkks. hehhs. -.-

yesterdayy wenta westmall to watch wedding crashers. mann the show is like so horny. porn sehh. that explains the nc16 part. i think they should put it as M18 lo. loll. hmm the movie is alright only la. not really that nice.

common test is coming. arghhs. jia you everyone. and sec 4s. prelims and O levels. hell. =/

ben and pearl : STOP TRYING TO USE THE STICK AND THROW AT THE CAMERA! (inside joke. -.- ) LOL.

shuai rite!~ of cuz la. my lao gong lei. =DD

*sticks out tongue* so ke ai! =p

shuai dai le. *faints*

superstar look sehh. =D

cool pose. shuai si ren!

nice teeth. LOL. =x

ermms. nvm still so shuai. =p

his signature!~ ahhh. everything bout him is nice. tt includes his signature. =DD

you never did know how to cherish;

you still dont anyway;

must i remind you the fact;
that time is running out.

- 4 more months -

2005-08-08T01:11:00.000+08:00

benjamin tan!~ u better be so honoured cuz this entry is specially for you. YOU AND ONLY YOU. lol. first time sehh. ehhs no no not first. =p bleahhs. second also not bad la. haha. he will always rank first. =p

okays anw i`m here just to announce benjamin tan of 4o2`o5// rawks my world. haha only he knows why. yeah!~ and boy i`m darn thankful. he`s so thoughtful mann. nice him. at least nv zhong se qing you sia. go date still can rmb help his friend run errand. not errand. i din ask u to. haha but u nice-ly did. =DD hehhs. for that u deserve a solo entry in my dear blog at like 1 o2 midnight! i`m so gonna melt when i see that thing. of cuz his bod rawkks like heaven mann. u know who i`m talking bout. god damn hot. =x oops. hehhs. xie xie ni. ahhhs! i cant wait. omg u still rawkk!~ *muacks* later she kill me sehh. lol. cya tmr. BEN YOU RAWK. thanks dude.

and shana. ben`s not my stead and i dun love him. i love my mvp. =x LOL. and fyi ben got stead le la. =p tsk tsk. expose him. -ROSE AND JACK- hahahaha. sia swayy.

why cant this year be like last year;

as we watched the fireworks together;

it was so so so magical;

cuz i was only staring at you.

*jia you* for ndp. ((=

dun sia sway on national tv kaes. =p

LOL.

2005-08-05T19:02:00.000+08:00

haven been blogging. cant exactly rmb everything that happened. loll. yeahhs point form yarr? =D

life is great once again. =DDD
these few days are extremely cold. -.- so nice to sleep in class.
photo taking was fun. loll. especially free pose. but i think i blinked. LOL. wadevaa. cuz the light was v bright.
stomach cramp. suckks.
hmgc was kind and we gained 10 buckks each. =p
bought lotsa new clothes n shoes. yeahhs. :D
ben me n pearl drove a car in nhss. shuangg. LOL.
me pearl lp n jo`s names jus entered cockpit. -.o attire n attitude. hur hur.
you just need 2.40 bucks to escape late coming. take cab from side gate to front gate. LOL. me n pearl did it. security dont checkk. =))
wilber will be in IMM on national`s day. *SCREAMS*
wilber`s new songs darn nice. esp geng wo zou ba. omgg sad. yeah my new blog song. he`s my MVP. =]]
hate ppl who spell WILBER pan as WILBUR pan. -.-
3 weeks to prelims. deadd.
15/20 for prelims eng oral. arghhh.
i miss dance terribly.
went to mr foo`s office to crap. saw this sheet of paper accidentally. pupils` names with their blogs url beside the names. wthh? same sentiments. so they`ll probably be reading this now. yeaa so ppl warn ya better be careful with they things u sayy. yea nice me. =))
graduation night for sec 4s in crown prince hotel. 70 bucks each. thank god its not high tea again.
our class video for end of yr is darn nice. pro ben. think alot of ppl will cry.
i will miss 4o2`o5//. i guess.
mrs ss tan is pro. she knows alot of stuffs. who`s my ex. who i`m with. omgg. nhss is scary.
tt`s it. bye. pics below. LOADS. dun die. =)) takkiare.

me and bel took part in superstar. lolls. JUST KIDDIN. -.-

hahaha. your fave poses. be honoured.

mr chan rawkks.

coward. leader. competitor. bimbo. thankss.

its for you.

read the letters n figure it out. =))

pearl thinks she`s darn cute in this pic. LOL. yeaa.

oops!~ exposed. HAHAHA.

me n my lao gong at www. shuangg. =D

yeaas. 4o2`o5 rawkks.

close upp.

woots. backstab sehh.

oh manns. fat cheeks. =x imitating someone la. not act cute la. LOL.

honey got sweeter;
baby got cuter;
suddenly.
=]]

glad we patched. hehhs. =))
you`ve been so bad. >.<
nvm i`m nice n forgiving. =p
my sushi rawkks hur. =DD

2005-07-30T19:10:00.000+08:00

p/s ` right click then press ok to hear the music. (i thinkk)

a very sad songg. =((

i didnt know
the best way to promise a girl
to treat her better
and to assure her your attitude will change for the better
and that you and her will have a better future
is to first feel guilty
and then apologise
lastly to avoid her.

how did we become;

the most intimate strangers.

` please don`t go away when i push u so
cuz it`s when i needed u the most
but i dun wanna say so.

2005-07-27T19:24:00.000+08:00

hey. i dun wish to continue this pointless arguement with you but do u even know how this whole damn matter started? oh yeaa. feel so sick havin to repeat myself. but since u dun seem to get my words inside ur brain. so here i go again. yepp. cuz this malicious pair of eyes diao-ed me when i walked past you that faithful day WITHOUT DOING ANYTHING. mayb u have a reason for diao-ing me but wait a sec. me n you? any connection? no. probably like some strangers or sth. okays mayb we can be classified as schoolmates or wadeva crapp u want. and not to mention the fact tt i actually smiled at u in the past. goshh. yepp so anyone would have been frigging pissed off. apparently tt includes me cuz i hate being diao for no freaking reason and so i blogged it down. i have every reason to cuz it`s MY blog i can jot down whatever i feel like spilling out. ohh so someone read it and got so unhappy n started bickering. yeaa so u`re prob gonna say its YOUR blog so u have every reason to blog it down too. but wad u typed doesnt make sense and most importantly it doesnt lead to the holy reason why was i diao-ed by u. yea yea. u mentioned u have this great attitude in you or sth. the attitude with the right to diao anybody u wish i suppose. too add on it wasnt ur good day hence u diao-ed me. ohh? but that doesnt exactly explains why u SMILED and said hi to my friend right after diaoing me. woah!~ some kinda attitude u call that? cool yeaa. i`m so impressed. GEEZ. wadeva is it. you and i both know tt u have sth against me tt makes u diao me. yea and U KNOW WADS TT STH. come up with wadeva reasons or excuses to free yourself. i dun give a damn. it doesnt concern me. but i din know u care so much to even ask him to come clean with you the relationship btw me n him. ooo. someone`s very interested huh. so i guess u got ur ans. yea. WE ARE PURELY FRIENDS. pleased with the ans? i suppose so. u asked me wads my prob. MY PROBLEM IS YOU. you started this whole shit mind you. muz i remind you of this fact once again. and gal. u can type wadeva u wan in ur blog after reading this cuz i`m so not gonna waste yet another entry to explain things to you. i hope u get my point which is tt i wont be replying any of ur shitty excuses u come up with in my next entry. this will be the last entry to clarify things with u cuz my blog should be about my life. y should i bother explaining facts to you which u r far to stubborn to accept. i was right. after so many attempts. my words never seem to penetrate thru ur thick skull. and for ur info. brain doesnt jus consist of intelligence. doesnt urs consist of some EQ or sth? ohh i forgot the great u have the right to diao whoever u wan so i`ll jus take it as u lack the latter in ur brain tt`s y it`s puny. clear enough? yepp. tadas. =]]

okayy enough of mean stuffs for mean people. time to type nice stuffs for nice people. ((= yepp my dearr pearl. loll. yea thanks arhh u know wad i mean. this week sux so much for me i guess. ha. monday night was disastrous u know why. thanks for being there yea. =]] ur sms-es. loll. altho it did not help at all i admit. =x was feeling so down no words can be heard la. oops. but yea i know u tried to cheer me up. and thanks. also for ur candy. loll. so sweet la. i only ate 3 cuz the rest were kope. -.o u rawk la! understand me so well. hehhs anything i will be there for u too. =D and joanna. blur blur one. loll. din know wad my sms meant at tt time. sorry arhh din explain at tt time cuz no mood la. but now u know le. ehhs but dun be angry with him la. =x he`s not as bad as the whole matter seems okayy. and thanks for showing concern. yepp *fragile kaiyan makes tt pathetic sound* LOL. u get it la. -.o i think its darn funny. haha. yea anything i will also be here for u huh. roti sux rmb ok. loll. getting full marks in an exam is the best. =]] yes and ben. for listening. haha. sorry i know tt slap was very hard. =x cant control at tt time. loll. nice u will forgive me la hor. *angelic smile* but i still bs u (omg BSU?!) lo. cuz i still think i`m not at any fault. being on a neutral side doesnt necessarily makes u think both parties will have fault de okayy. and you. THANK YOU FOR ALWAYS BLOCKING MY FANTASTIC VIEW OF HIM. >.<

yepp monday had prelims eng oral. went well i think. or i hope at least. =x thank god its eng and not chi. cuz i suck at chi oral. last yr had my chi O level oral and it was shitty. the invigilator said "dian zi you jian" and i mistook it for sms instead of email. yea so went on blabbing my views on sms until she told me "excuse me. dian zi you jian shi 'email'. bu shi 'sms'." i was like. omgg! *faints* loll. but luckily tt didnt took away my a1. =D

indeed. 25th is a jinx date. EVERY month.

today recess din went down. gao zi bi. stayed in class listen to songs. yea den i listen listen. feeling so sad. keep thinking bout the matter until cry again in class la. =x freakk la. i hate tt feeling. oh ya who was the one who offered the tissue to me huh? din look up to see who was it. but yea whoever are you. thanks. the tissue definately helped. cuz my table wet wet le i need sth to dry it. ha. and ms chan thot i was sick cuz she said my face looked pale. yepp and treated me ultra-ly nice. -.o yea den after sch wenta JE eat the jap food with san ba jie mei. after eating sleepy us wanted to find somewhere to slp. so went to second storey to search for a comfortable spot. found an empty table to lie on. so we jus occupied tt table to ourselves and listened to mp3 and slept. i slept the longest i guess. oops. they hafta wake me up. loll. the recent nights are depriving me of my sleep. haii yea so i slept like a pigg. =/

yea and grace. saw ur entry le. loll. thankss =]] no la not the prob with ur tgbrd. is my com i think. hehhs. wah ur friend? not my fault i met derrick in mac ma! haha. tell her dun jealous. =p jkjk la. anw he got gf le la. super loving lo. haha. but still support derrick! =DD oh ya cheri thanks for ur message too. haha. i saw it. *huggs*

****

once
a guy hurt a girl so much
that she chose to leave him silently
and get out of his life

but the guy did not stop her

then one day

he realised he wanted her back in his life again

he tried ways and means

but not wanting to get hurt again

the girl said no

crying, the guy asked God

"dear God

if we were meant to be

why did i lose her?"

God replied

"dear child

you didnt lose her

you chose to let her go".

****

take care everyone.

smile.

i want to be remembered;

as the girl who always smiled;

even when her heart was broken;

the one who could brighten your day;

even if she couldnt brighten her own

i can fill a thousand pages

telling you how much i feel

but still i know

you will not understand

so now i leave you without a sound

execpt my heart shattering

as it hits the ground

`i can feel now in your eyes

the changing way you look at me

2005-07-24T19:07:00.000+08:00

ohh i so wanna know how did u know i was talking about u if u din diao me. i left no clues about you gal. hell i din ask u to smile at me jus cuz i am a senior. so wads the big deal if i am a senior. i dun think there`s any. the least u can do is not diao me. its not exactly my fault its ur so called bad day and i just so happen to walk past you ya? ohh u mean if my lover leaves me i have the damn right to go round killing people? how funny. ohh degrading? h a h a. you are seriously entitled to whatever opinions that you think make sense to wads left of your puny brain. and if u really do get offended with the things i say. i guess i`d made my point across. i`m so not going to apologise cuz all of this aint my fault. and i wonder wthh am i typing all these and wasting my space to explain things to you which i think can hardly penetrate through your thick skull. and i said i wont tell him i mean i wont. i dun see the point. ohhs. to add on i din know u do read my blog if not someone else told me. should i feel god damn honoured and thank you? (:

shan let her waste anymore of my space. hehhs. and i adopted two kittens from ben!~ his mum dun let him keep n we cant let it die rite. awww. its so cute i tell ya. love them loads. *cuddles* ya i used to hate animals. ehhs I STILL DO anyway. =x LOL. arent they v scary looking? as in they look so diff from humans lo. oops. but for the first time i actually think these two kitties v ke ai. and i actually dare to touch them! =DD *achievement!* yepp so got it from ben took cab from sch with them in a constricted box. keep meowin in the cab lo. haha. and the cab driver v irritating lei. =x keep chatting. grrr. i wanna slp lo. llol. reached home my bro helped me give the kittens a bath. not badd arhh him. quite gentle. LOL. tsk tsk. at night we wenta pet shop and got the two kittens alot of stuffs. milk. cat food. chain. bowl. anti-flea shampoo. brush. conditioning spray. breathe spray. and i forgot wad le. so lucky rite animals nowadays! loll like human lidat. we spent so much money lo. brought 80 bucks there still not enough. muz use nets. -.o and u so dun wanna know wad we name the kittens. LOL. =x

tmr is eng oral. i seriously dread it. oh noo. and prelims is coming. haii. i need some motivation plss. going off for buffet dinner now! *yumm* hehhs. piggy me. takkiare everyone. =]] alot of pics below.

ooo. nice ties. loll. san ba rawkks. =D

me n mei luan. she looks so pretty tt dayy.

loll. getting ready at ben`s house.

acting cute la. =x

nice pic. =]]

hmmms.

best friends for life. ((=

kelvin the shuai ge.

why is it that we all have a special someone in our heart;

that we know we shouldnt love but do anyway.

problems problems problems again.

sorry if i made u felt upmost sad cuz of my post. i dun mean anything to hurt you the least bit. jus typing out wad i`m feeling. it sucks. i should have known my previous post was too private to be posted. but dun feel sad. its not worth it. ya i understand cuz i get that damn feeling sometimes inside me too. but it`s just that... i dunno how to put it. and i really din mean to compare u n him. sometimes i just cant help it. get better after a period of time? a period how long? we used to think we always got better after a period. but the cycle never ends there. it continues and everything repeats. to tell you the truth. i am really tired of this. drained. i feel equally as empty as you are. this shouldnt be our case. but still. try not to feel so empty. once again it`s not worth it. and lastly you dont suck okayys. dont say that pls.

` baby dont make me promises ;

cuz you never did know how to keep them well.

2005-07-21T23:37:00.000+08:00

wet dreams 2 is funny movie la. LOLL. the korean male lead totally look like wilber pan lo! so shuaii. :D omgg but i warn ya it`s like freaking bian tai de lo. they show porn pics. =x and erms the gals expose alot of flesh. v sexy ehhs. haha guys dun get too hornyy. yeass that`s y it`s nc16. aww kids cant watch. =p wednesday aft sch wenta westmall with pearl jo lp bt n shin. we jus in time mann. lucky us. hoho. we were laughing super loud in the cinema lo. sia swayy. haha but not alot of ppl in the cinema la. and did i mention the fact tt me pearl lp n jo were the only gals in the cinema? =x horny us. LOL. the show like esp for guys lo. cuz its gals expose alot wad. haha. yepp overall the movie is funny la. and educational? =/ oops. haha cuz it teaches u alot of things. got boobs. menstruation. eraction. flasher. sex. gals n guys de u-know-where. haha. wthh i told u its bian tai. and the most impt lesson is age is only a number. LOLL. yeaa. pearl *winkks.

came out of theatre load of us were freezin. haha. super coldd!~ yepps then jo went off first. to... -.o lol. the rest of us go burger king eat. then 5 of us sat n crapped. talk bout chio bu n shuai ge. lol. bt is so funny lo. talk talk talk left at like 6+ i think. force shin to go platform with us when he got a direct bus home. haha then only me n shin take same side de train. the rest left le. but in the end he dun wan take mrt le. loll. decided to take direct bus. so he pei me until my train came then he left. so gentlemen. loll. =DD sorry arhhs. waste ur mrt fare. haha. oh ya and i found out something. *ohhhh. =]]

i`m freaking pissed today. ya you like him. you are in love with him. you are waiting for him. and wthh has it gotta do with me? do you have to diao me? is it my blardie fault that u heard rumors about us being together or something. is it my fault that u cant have him in ur arms. is it my fault that u n him cant be together as much as u want to? wow when i walked past you you diao-ed me. but hell in the first damn place i dun even know you okays. you faggot junior diao-ed me when i dun even know your ass face? i din witness it. but pearl n ben saw it and told me. and sadly exposed your cowardly act. hey gal if unhappy with me n him have the guts to diao me IN MY FACE WHEN I`M LOOKING AT YOU. not when u`re behind me and when i`m not looking. and also. it`s not as if by diao-ing me he will go to you or something. anw this faggot is NOT from dance de. dancers will never behave like her lo. i felt so much like slapping her kaes. wtf is her damn problem man? and by diao-ing me will he love you? will ur distance be drawn nearer or something? use your pea size brain and think yea. if u ever have one. hate it when i get diao-ed for no reason by some unreasonable faggots. a junior wads more. yea and great for the rest of my day my mood was ruin by her. the first person i wanted to complain to was him. but thot twice. i dun think he will believe me anyway. why would an innocent looking girl diao a senior? HAHA. I WONDER TOO. yepps. she`s prettier. she`s cuter. she`s sweeter.

SHE RAWKKS LA KAES?

fcukk.

hais. i`m lost again. =/ suddenly dreamt of him again. omgg. the dream is super flash back lo. it seems so blardie real. -.- but yeaa. i realise i miss him so muchh. SO MUCH. woke up and realise everything`s jus a freaking dream. imagine how i felt. sucky yea. the same morning waiting for bus and it was raining. listening to jay`s songs and kept thinking bout the dream. it jus kept occurring. hais den cry. not exactly cry bah. jus got tears. freakk la. it`s like i miss him so terribly lo. not as if i din see him at all. in fact i see him everyday. but yea. i jus miss the past. the memories. then that afternoon go sch walked past him alot of times. like in a million yrs suddenly we keep bumping into each other lo. the stairs. outside my class. outside his class. outside the toilet. in the canteen. undescridable feeling everytime our gaze interlock. i dun understand why we suddenly keep bumping into each other after my dream. haii weird. =/ den the same night listen to 933. the first song i heard was his fave song. omgg den i thot of him again. yepp so my whole day was jus filled by him. hais. why? why izzit tt after my dream my whole world seem to be revolving ard him again? i mean i never thot of him all these while since i`m with the other him. but that dream totally jus reminded me of him. but as much as i try to forget it. it just kept recurring in my mind. so now why am i looking out for him again. wishing he will walk past me again. wishing we will meet at the stairs again. i thot i was suppose to give up long ago. yea since that day? hais why are all the feelings flowing back again. why are all the memories flooding back again? i just dread this feeling. how i wished we were still in the past. sms-ing. email-ing. chatting. exchanging letters. now? complete strangers who walk past each other without even exchanging a simple hi. and the worst thing of all. i dun even know who i like. him or him? hais wthh. i am happy with him. but sometimes his attitude just irks me. and i really dun understand wad he wans. he can be so nice to you a moment. the next he will treat you coldly. who likes to be treated this way? he`ll never realise this. no matter how many times i try to express myself. but i USED to be happy with the other him. and for a moment he was out of my life. everything was great. but now? i`m missing him like crazy now. so it`s him or him that i wan now? freakk mann. i hate this feeling. i assume everything was okay and assured myself he was the one. but after the dream. i`m not so sure anymore. i`m starting to doubt myself. hais. wthh this is so suckyy. i know i`m being so unfair to him. i`m sorry. but what can i do. unless an angel appears before me and tells me. him or him? haiss. i duno who to turn to. not becuz there`s no one by my side. i know my friends are. esp my san ba jie mei. but cuz i doubt anyone will understand. they can lend me a listening ear. but they can never solve my problem. a stupid problem started by a dream. wow? a dream? a non-existent thing?

yepps and the ironic thing is that i forward both of them one forwarded sms each. yeaa. two diff replies. he said "i send you that before le." then our conversation lasted not more then 5 sms-es. pathetic i know. cuz like wow? he wans go shower. wad can i say? fine lo. while the other he replied "thanks..." that was more appreciated u know? and our conversation lasted all the wayy to 2 sth midnight. what a total different ending? ha. i duno wad else to say. i should have guessed as muchh.

ohh no. is this entry kinda too private to be posted?

zhou jie lun;

pan wei bo;

you and your freaking attitude.

i so hate it.

`what a nice 5th month.

2005-07-18T20:01:00.000+08:00

ytd was 88th. not too bad. hehhs. afternoon met pearl wenta jp buy some last min accessories to touch up cuz we look v plain. LOL. after wenta clem met ben n lp. 4 of us wenta style our hair. hehhs. me n lp straightened. ben n pearl put wax i thinkk. yepp. we look so stylo. LOL. den wenta ben`s house did make up. haha his mum quite nice mann. =D yea then we took pics at his house. nice ehhs. but cant upload yet the pics still in ben`s cam. BEN COME ONLINE NOW! *sends telepathy* lets see if by the time i finish blogging he`ll come online. hehhs.

after wenta sch. woots. ppl dressed more formally than i expected. yepp everyone look so shuai n so chio manns. hmm the food was not badd. edible. LOL. the prawns was very nice lo. i ate like... ALOT. oops. yepp watched the screen. wah the camera zoom in on alot of dance peeps lo. saw so many ppl. haha. and dancers u guys did well!~ =]]

after the dinner wenta canteen saw alot of dance peeps. lol. the girls started screaming when they saw me lo. -.0 lol. wthh. then took pics with some of them. haha sec 1 n 2 gals so cute lo. den alot of ppl left le. supposedly going clem with 4o2// peeps drink de. lol. but stayed back pei him la. after he left then leave also lo. by the time reach home my feet darn pain le la. haha cuz i was wearing heels ytd for the first time! omgg leg muscle v tired mann. but v fun lei. lols.

today suppose to pon sch de. wth then i was in bed. my phone keep ringing la. first was pearl. den jo. then ben. all called to ask if miss loke called me. haha. she wanted us to like report at sch NOW! damn. i was still in bed happily dreaming. yea so in the end go lo. haha wadeva la. dismiss early anw. we reached sch everybody started leaving. -.- yea so we went k-box lo. went at 11 sth left at 5 i think. omgg rite. mad us. LOL. then listen to some sad songs. everytime lidat de lo. listen listen den will become sad de. haha. freakk la. *ai wo hai shi ta* is damn freaking nice. =[ ehhs pearl. bout the disappointment thing. i mean. its like sharing u know. how would u feel if he did this to u instead. put one of hims in my shoe last time. last time as in. me her him. yeaa u know. hows the damn feeling? not a least good. u saw how hurt i was. so think for him. u r like my him(last time) now. and ur both hes are like me n her(last time) now. and u said my him should jus be decisive. yea then y r u still not? yepp but i`m not lecturing u la. haha. jus like my advice for u lo. i care cuz u`re my friend lo. no not my friend. my best friend yeaa? u know i telling u all these cuz erm ya. it concerns feelings. dun u think u`re getting a lil over-enthu this time. over him. dun forget ur status. but whateva u do i`m here alwayys yea. =]] got prob i`m here to listen. hehhs. =D friends for life. and anything u dun understand ask me or call me la. i lurva ya. :)

ai ben lai jiu ying gai du yi wu er.

yea shibin i know u reading this now. NO!~ haha. =p stop forcing me. kaes actually i got no comments. so dun ask le. hehhs. =DD

okays end of blog ben`s still not online. *telepathy officially failed!* zzz. more pics next update. =]] takkiare peeps.

i am JILL

you are WILL

let`s go CHILL!~

this is lame shit. loll.

styled hair. =]]

look weird in this pic. duno y. =/

when you said those words;

those were the sweetest things i`ve ever heard;

hot. hot. hot. hot. hot. hot.

so hot. LOL.

=]]

open ur dead blog la. zzz.

i already start mine le.

`3 more dayys to 5 months.

loll.

2005-07-15T21:16:00.000+08:00

tgif! blogging again. =]] haha why am i being so enthu suddenly. i jus blog two days ago lo. bleh wadeva la. "the aftermath of not" blogging for a period of time. hehhs. (sounds familiar to u know who hor. =p)

ytd wenta jp with san ba jie mei. pearl went mad in ljs lo. laughing at every single thing. LOL. she bought her attire for 88th dinner le. nice ehhs. button shirt n pants. looks good. =] we`re having such a hard time tt we guessed prom night we`re gonna shop till our legs break or sth.

today supposedly gg to watch wet dreams with san ba jie mei de. yea that nc 16 horny movie. but busy jo got sth in the end so me n pearl wenta causeway point to watch be with you. tt sad jap movie. hmm heard alot of ppl cried so thot will very dramatically sad. but o well in the end it was okay only la. but me n pearl cried also la. haha. it`s like after the movie i asked her "did u cry?" she was like "eh ya.". i replied "actually me too." LOL. trying to act brave but failed attempt. =x the male lead totally resembles the cross breed between adrian and alex toh lo! the female lead is very chio. and the son is so darn kawaii. real kawaii lo. not like some ppl who obviously failed terribly. lol. *hmgc we know who. =DD yeaa den walked ard causeway. looking for accessories to go with my dress for 88th dinner. but in the end din buy anything. den me n pearl saw some freaking chio walllets la. wanted to get but broke le. but dun wanna use atm cuz obviously a receipt will be sent to our dads. haha so in the end manage to get william to buy it for me. wahh he so nice lo. still rawkks after so long. hehhs. if u r reading this. thx!~ =]]

i duno why but i`m super broke this week lo. damn it. paid alot of money to class fund to buy ALOT of stuffs. hmm den now magazines all come out le. lol. spent money again.this month the cleo not nice de. zzz. waste money. seventeen is still lying on my bed. no time to read. getting quite excited bout the dinner after seeing the tables set up le. not as bad as i thot la at least.

shall update after the dinner. haha ben`s bringing his cam we`re gonna take loads of pics. will upload. =]] and xinjie grace n jeslyn if u`re reading this i cant tag ur tagbrd. i duno y. haha. anw i passed my e maths test! miraculously.

jeff`s darn friendly n funny in real life. we shared tt packet. LOL. =]

me n *di ahh ahh* LOL. lurve ya.

this lil baby...

grew up into this girl!~ lol. pearl took this anw. -.o

what did i say;

what did you do;

how did i fall in love with you;

you yes you.

hot. cold. hot. cold. hot. cold.

stop changing will ya.

cuz you dont know how does it feels.

to be treated.

hot. cold. hot. cold. hot. cold.

~~it suckks.~~

` i wish i understand you a lil better.

2005-07-13T20:19:00.000+08:00

wahhs my blog is alive again!~ hehhs. closed for awhile cuz of some personal reason la. yeaa anw i`m blogging again. =]] this song is darn nice rite. so freaking sadd. =/

nkf performance was great manns. an experience i would nv forget. make up n hair done by professionals. my hairstylist is very cute la. haha i swearr. ask bel. =x yepp he`s so cute. until... haha nvm. met loads of stars there. haha den there was star crazee. =D took pics with them. christopher; jeff; ix chen and most impt is ADAM! omgg i finally see adam in real live. *faints* omgg he is darn man lo. too bad a lil short ehhs. but nvm lidat then competible with me! *blush* he got a hot bod lo! =D and he put his arm on my shoulder! *jumps up and down* the pics still in sam`s camera. zzz. will upload if i get them. and alex toh totally patted my head cuz BEL the nice ass pushed me to him and i bang into him. -.- y dun wan push me to adam! LOL. haha den christopher ask me wad we dancing i said in a very sia sway tone *oei oei oei* LOL. i think he dun understand a shit. yeaa but wh told me i should have jus said *nan hua dance society*. true =/. but everyone said the performance was nice. they saw me on tv. oh manns. going to watch the tape. but until now still haven get. y arhhs hb? -.- lols. quickk la.

miss chan super angry with our class today. arhhs same old prob. coming to class late and not tucking in shirts. wthh. she asked one ques (forgot wad le) but the class din ans her she totally pms and stopped teaching lo. sat there n frown. until jess asked her if she wans continue teaching she started lecturing us. okays mayb she din exactly lecture but her voice sounded like she`s gonna cry. =/ felt quite bad la. rot for whole geo lesson. bell rang n she left in rage. we din even greet her gdbye. but after she left out class went mad again. -.0 noisyy.

i seriously cant decide wad to wear for 88th dinner. bahhs. the jap top or the dress? omgg sianss. muz be formal. hmm c wad the rest wearing first bahh. dance performers jia youss ehh. =DD good luckks. stupid lo. today they asked us go hall to practise singing our sch song so as to impress PM lee on sunday. sing two times somemore. like wthh we are paying to go for that stupid dinner lo. we are guests too rite. ( i duno y is my font so big here. -.- )

me n esther. weets steads rawkk.

that`s my hairstylist! haha duno y i smile till so happy. -.-

san ba jie mei at marina square. =]]

ben from channel U! so ke ai. =D

derrick from superstar. haha. cute too.

me n infatuated bel. -.0

bu xiang xing guo lai

pai zheng kai yan jing

ni bu zai

keep asking myself if i was dumb to lie for you;

but my heart tells me i`m not;

people say follow your heart;

so yeaa;

i`m not =)

actually. i meant every word i said.

`if only everything was for real.

2005-07-01T21:17:00.000+08:00

wahhs. one week passed since sch reopen le. fast mann. wasnt as bad as i thot tho. at least not sian la. haha crapping in class is darn funn. =]] i think i`m lagging behind my studies le. oh no.

yepps then monday tuesday n thursday after sch went to eat with san ba jie mei. haha plus ben la. (*extra!* jkjk only la. lao D! lol.) we can seriously recruit him le. haha. =x crapped n talked so much. we reach ginza at like 2 plus we left at 7 plus. -.0 ehhs. wthh. hey sanbas. mayb we should have prince n princess of the week also? haha. runner up ma. ahhs not funny.

hmm sth bad happen lo. not talking bout my hair color part la. ya those who get wad i mean. i mean it`s so wthh la. it`s really weird to talk to her bout this kinda things lo. like wow. a discipline mistress. wthh. now i see her the feeling guai guai wan. =/ *shrugs* hope everything`s okay arhh. but i have a bad feeling she`s nt dumbb. the things she said to me. make me feel... hmmms... i have loads to say la. but cant write it here. loads of spy. yaya. but duno if i`ve done the right thing by doing so (think nobody will know wad i`m talking bout except u). and i feel bad cuz i l*** to her. but dun wanna see u get c*** you know. arhh. one time is really enough.

today had dance again. practise for sentosa and nkf the performance. wahs so fast this coming sunday is sentosa de performance le. woots. hope everything goes well. cuz the stage is so darn small. arhhhs. after tt had nkf practice. wthh i duno wad happened to me. but i did everything wrongly la. so so screwed up. so paisae lo. everyone did correctly den i`m the only one having so many mistakes. which makes it so obvious. hmmm. i cant concentrate. =x hais. accumulated so many cuts on my legs la. knees n feet. bahhs. so pain to shower. ):

dun feel like gg 88th dinner le lo. nhss students made to sit in parade square. -.- while the lucky PM lee goes up to the hall and watch the performances. then we sit in parade sqaure happily staring at the projector screen. *wow?* sianss arhh. can i claim back my 60 bucks n buy other stuffs. i wan watch dance performance lo. esp hong ma yi. yepp talking bout tt dance. the actions darn nice! den me n sam see le so gek cuz sec 4s cant dance. we watch watch watch until really cant control le we cried lo. i know very wthh la. lol. but the dance is really VERY nice. the feeling of graduating and not being able to dance is so so so suckyy. all the best to those performers anw. jia youss ehhs. =]] nhds rawkks.

i took those times for granted
so i`m left with only memories
but i can still hear our laughters

i can still taste our tears

yepp how i wish.

2005-06-26T22:14:00.000+08:00

AHHHS!! i watch initial d le! oh manns i tell u the movie rawkks BIG time. jayy was so darn cool in that show. the wayy he drives his AE86. wads more the movie is funny mann. that ah mu. LOL. *shen ye shi ren!* okayys i shant say more. ppl like junying haven watch. gal muz quickly go watch kaes! it`s super nice. ALL gals should go watch la. the 9.5 buckks is worth sitting in the cinema drooling over guys like JAY EDISON n SHAWN (alrite alrite only =p). edison was darn cute mann. i feel like watching second time la. lols. but so sad see that jap gal hold jay`s hand. hug jay. kiss jay. omgg. sianss. LOL. my lao gong lei! *grrrr* then my jie lun lao gong (=P lalalas) cried lo. wahhs. in the cinema my tears were building up too lo. inital d rawkks. takumi rawkks. AE86 rawkks. jay rawkks. MY LAO GONG RAWKKS. =]]

went to watch it on sat. met lp at bukit batok first. her eye shadow is nice. =] yepp den went jP to shopp. watch movie. we shop till legs darn tired la. she bought two tops. i bought one top. one shorts. one bag. one pair of shoes. spent so much money. i`m broke once again. hehhs. then we wanted this wallet darn badly la. tried ways n means to brain wash ppl. LOL. funny manns. the guy working there was like *blurr*. haha. but we did not get the wallet in the end. =p then we did some other bimbo stuffs which u so dun wanna know. LOL. overall was a bimbotic day spentt. =]]

today went PA withh esther. weets been so long since i step there. kinda miss it. )): we were basically slacking there. literally la. sitting down playing handphone eating biscuits. LOL. others all dancing and moving lo. bleahhs. =p watched their nkf dance. totally! loved it. esp the guy part. wayy cool lo. haha enthu me n esth tried to learn from royy. but... o wells. u dun wanna know the result. =]] anw their performance is 3rd of july. nkf charity show. opening item i guess.

few more hours to sch. DAMN IT! june hols is offically over. i`m so sian diao. arghhh.

remember the first day when i saw your face
remember the first day when you smiled at me
you stepped up to me
and then you said to me
i was the woman you dreamt about.

remember the first day we stopped playing games

remember the first day you fell in love with me

i felt so good for you to say those words

cuz i felt the same way too.

remember the first day when you called my house
remember the first day when you took me out
we had butterflies
although we tried to hide
and we both had a beautiful night

remember the first day
the first day we kissed
remember the first day we had an arguement
we apologized
and then we cmpromised
and we havent argued since

the way we held each other`s hand
the way we talked
the way we laughed
it felt so good to fall in love
and i knew right then you were the one.

but the feeling wasnt the same anymore.
was it?

ha. yea rightt.

boy you got me blinded

2005-06-23T15:54:00.000+08:00

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.

In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.

You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was arrogant, acting like the dictator of your life.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

haha omgg i think it`s v true mann. scary lo. esp the first one and the marriage one. lol.

wah been so long since i`ve come online. zzZzZ! sth`s wrong with my darn com. haha. and so longg le. i forgot wad to blog bout. =x

ehhs. father`s dayy went the chinese restuarant to eat. the whole restuarant was so darn crowded. waiting so long for my favourite crabbs! weets. haha. my mum paid la. lol. too bad la. me n my bro only know how to open our mouth n eat. hehhs. more like hubby`s day or sth. LOL.

i`m so look forward to nkf performance la. haha but is it on 3rd or 10th arhhs. paisae la i nv pay attention. =x but hopefully is on 3rd. where we can meet all the stars! imagine like wilber or jay come! okayys jay is so not going to come to this kinda charity show so forget it. ): hhaa and bel n i are so WELL-PLANNED for the event. u so dun wanna know wad r we up to. LOL. *winkks*

bukit panjang plaza gt this madagscar show for kids de. den me n my bro were asked to go on stage by this emcee lo. wthh. lol. she totally pointed to us and shouted in the mic. was super sia-swayed. how can we ever go up. it`s a show for KIDS for godness sake. LOL. den we shook our heads n quickly walk away. and she shouted again "heyy! c`mon! dun go away! come up la!" everybody turned to look at us. then i pushed my bro in the nearest shop and ended that embarrassment. *phew* haha but can still hear her ranting in the mic. wthh lo. so paisae. *blush*

initial d is out today! ppl muz go watch it n support jay! today suppose to go watch with lp de. hmms but no more tickets le. haha see jay is so hot. hehhs n shana. jay is NOT acting cool. he IS god darn cool. =DD

before chingay performance. ): i miss it.

haha me n lp again.

pan shuai. so shuai mann. =D *screams*

PAP that time.

omgg. my hair. =/ LOL.

oops. is my shirt still out beside foo? =p

so pinkie. =D

BSU. =DD black n white.

*loser sign*

so faithfully

holding on to every dream

i thought our love would ever be

as the scent of hope slips through my fingers

plain for me to see

so much were left unsaid

2005-06-17T21:42:00.000+08:00

boy i`m happy tonightt. (: cleared my doubts. haha i`m stupid all these while. gawdd. should have knew he wasnt that kinda guy like that from the start. feels so good to see his msg appearing on my phone again. =]]]

heyy. thanks for everything. thanks for always being so understanding. thanks for always being so tolerance towards my unreasonable demands and all. thanks for always trying to put on a normal front when you have your own worries. thanks for being always there for me to punch and slap and kick. sorry for always being so not understanding. sorry for always being so unreasonable. sorry for always complaining to you about my own difficulties. not thinking that you have them yourselves. sorry for kicking you. slapping you. using u as a punching bag. ( but i will still. =p i needa vent my anger ) haha. thanks and sorry for everything boy. you rawkk. (: so we`re okayy now i guess? really apologetic for the past. seems like every entry will be something against you. haha wads got inside me man. dunno wad was i thinking. but those rumors and those questions that everyone start asking me is unbearable for me too. but it`s really glad to know that time after time you will be forgiving. =D you aint a petty guy. and each time you tried hard to patch really moved me. tho i dont say it out. =p the things you do. the words you said. i seem untouched but actually i`m so touched okayys. haha. okays wad got into me today. saying all these. but jia youss ehh. dont worry la. you`ve said out your dreams le so it wont come true anymoree. hehhs. get back to her if you think there`s still chance. dont give up even if it means a little. every part counts. all the bestt. =]] once again thankss for everything. *baby and honey * HAHAHA. =x

when you need someone

you just turn around

and i wil be there

when you`re feeling low

baby let me know

and i will be there (:

2005-06-16T20:51:00.000+08:00

yippie. i got my new phone le. samsung e810c. the slide up phone. i`m so loving it. hehs i think it`s so chio la. wad a chio bu. =D and the best thing is that no more ring ring tone when u ppl call. guess hu will be picking up the line first before it get passed to me? *drumrolls* JAY CHOU MY LAOGONG! yes u ppl can hear his voice. man totally!!! but ehhs. i still miss all my previous msgs. boos. yea my previous no. is no longer in use le. change no. le. shant write it here. =p hhaa there`s loads of spies. ehh ask me on msn bah. (: my contacts are ALL gone. yup do me a favour tell me ur no. kaes. thx ya. and save me all the trouble. *muackks. i`m jealous of my bro man. LOL. he pretend to pei me go buy phone with my daddy in the end he got himself a new phone easily. >.<

suppose to go the pck musical with jo spens n st on wed night de. but my dad`s bringing me to buy handphone. so in the end told jo i`m nt gg for the muscial le. =/ oops. duno but i sense tt she like a lil pissed off. sorry arhh gal. =x really hard to live a day without a phone u know. hope u all enjoy the musicak anw. san ba san jie mei forever! dont angry le la. muz be happy happy den have the gossip mood ma. =p *smile* sorry.

today i was finally a LITTLE motivated to start my pile of hw! *claps* yea yea sat down n did hw for like 10 mins my mom came knocking on my door. "wey gal. pei mummy go shopping!" haha i was like "i doing hw la!" and her shopping prob means grocery anw. -.0 she was like "aiyo. hols do wad hw? hols is for u to relax! come come. let`s go!" *then she switched off the air con and v act seh de walk out of my room*. haha wthh where got mummy like that one. lol she`s funny man. yupps den pei her to the mall lo. zzZzZ she did her grocery i did my shopping. HAHA. of cuz she paid la. but nice me din really buy alot lo. one top one skirt and some handphone accessories. she bought so much food lo. omgg. she was like "now den u know ur papa korkor n u eat like some pigs?" LOL. -.0 okayys. *blush* den too many things to carry le fragile me cannot help so we hired a cabby home. yeahhs. (:

my bro is irritating la. haha keep calling me "miss bio (as in biology) 101." okayys it`s dumb rite. haha cuz it`s like he doesnt take bio den i got ma. so keep gek-ing him with those facts i`ve studied. like he eating then i`m like "kor u know how the food u swallowed goes down?". "ehhs sweating arh? u know why?". "cant see w/o ur contacts arh? u know y?" he stares at me and like "i dun have to know. and i dun wan to know." haha funny. i was like "kor tt`s becuz u DUNO y." hehhs. he so gek la. =p "fine lo. i shall call u miss bio 101 in future. happy?" haha then now he talk to me is like "oi miss bio 101. help me take this...blah blah." haha yup that`s my very irritating bro. =DD okay actually i duno wads the pt of blogging this. HAHAHA. fine end it. pics again. =p awww. too bad la.

yippie. this is my new phone. (:

got shooting starz in classrm! -.-

breakfast with foo. muahaha.

the three san ba! *GOSSIP.EAT.SLEEP* =D

wahahas. kelvin n me.

mr yep requested this pic to be print for him! LOL.

ya can. sure. *dream on*

miss BONG and us. =p

hahahaha. our CD cover. lalalas.

our fingers- 1 2 3 4 5. =D

why is it that when you see me

you pretend i`m not that

but when i look deep inside

somehow you seem to care

2005-06-13T21:01:00.000+08:00

back from malaysia. haha. omgg 10 hrs drive there. 10 hrs drive backk. zzZzZ. sit until my butt so pain la. haha. but in btw got breakstops. hmm other than some slp n refreshments. the rest of the 20 hrs was spent thinking bout him. it`s scaryy man thinking backk. =x on the way to malaysia witness this accident. a motorbike skidded i thinkk. yuckks lo. saw two man lying in the middle of the road. face totally covered with blood. very eeks. then the hand was fractured i guess. it was like very out of shape. i think i wont ride a motorbike for the rest of my life. scary. yup went to this island in malaysia. din take note of the name. OOPS. haha. but basically the island is very tropical. the beaches n stuffs were super chio. but burning hot mans. i`m like super dark now. haha. then at night cant slp. so many sleepless night le. =/ hais. den went down to the hotel lobby go online. haha. den got other teenagers there. we look like some idiots la. midnight staring at the coms. this guy wan make friend la. den i say anything lo. but i told him cant give him hp no. cuz i lost my hp he was like " wa lau. come up with better excuse la! quick quick! give me." haha wthh lo. wad he wans. i really dun have hp now wad. -.0 the island also nth much to buy de. food stuffs n handicrafts only. singaporeans wont like it tt kind. haha so we din buy anything.

haiyo ppl. i wont go suicide de la. LOL. u ppl so ji dong for wad. hehhs i say IF only ma. i swear i wont go commit suicide kaes. i`m not tt silly. (: and ppl arhh. dun need talk to that unknown. let him say wad he wants lo. he`s talking to himself only ma. =D

i haven touch a single hw yet lo. omgg sians. no motivation to pia lei. tskk. stupid Os. think next week den i start doing bahhs. ehhs ya anw i think i getting the slide up phone. it`s super chio. silver somemore. was thinking of getting the other slide up de cuz got bluetooth n mp3 but it`s black lei. -.- not as chio. ivy u getting that phone arh. nice meh. =p oops. haha. get same as mine la. hehhs e810 i think. forgot the model le. gt video recorder also. den we same same. =D

i`m sick. bahhs. fever sorethroat n cough. so uncomfortable. luckily the nkf dance prac nt during the june hols arh. if not how am i gonna dance. haha. more pictures below. haha sry la. bsu v zi lian de cann. =p

that`s the top i bought.

ben lai! (haha pearl i`m too lazy to edit.)

hou lai! haha nvm. only san ba san jie mei will know. =p

haha. acting superstar. =x

wad is lp doing? -.-

now wad is spens doing. lols.

bsu de gals. cool rite this pic.

si lian la can.

me n lp.

~~huh wad? take care of yourself la.~~

how should i deal with how i feel.

2005-06-09T20:19:00.000+08:00

hmm. dunno which phone to get lei. my dad brought back some leaflets let me choose. ehhs the sliide up one betta or flip phone. or 6170? bahhs i duno which one to get!

few days ago helping out with the electronics camp thing. basically did nth much arhh. wad can the dun-take-physics students help out in? ha we went there to pon maths lesson only la. heh great success. i like the tic tac toe thing. pretty cool. we were guessing this guy by the name of da hai likes pearl. ha.

then today had dance. finally. after a billon years. was really like quite anticipating at first. but went there. the mood jus dun seem right. hmm seems like dance had change. or izzit jus me. bah anyway oei oei oei will be performing at sentosa in july. hmm 7 mins. no cut. den also got performance for the charity. for some cancer thing. will be on tv. sec 4s still deciding if wan go nots. hmm i think i should be gg bah. but the whole performance cut till 2 mins only. =/ nvm la. after tt shall concentrate on my Os. hais suckks. our coach like super disppointed with the sec 4s. cuz we din immediately like agreed to perform. many were still discussing. yea of of our v sucky results. aiya duno la. he today like keep aiming the sec 4s lo. hais but he muz have felt so disappointed bah.

after dance took train with bel. talking bout our lives. we were saying they seem meaningless. -.0 true wad isnt it. yea talking bout ways of suicide. then we like saying if really wanna die we will take pills. cuz least pain la duh. hmm omgg. y am i talkin bout this kinda things with her when i used to be so so so against suicide. now i understand y ppl acutally commit suicide. mayb they really cant take it anymore to the pt where nth else matter much to them.

ehhs dancer. thanks for ur tag. ur words are. hmm. i duno how to put it. but thx. ehh u jus say u sec wad. i prob will know. and i think u should stop tagging and make things worstt. sorry.

~~ya u din say that. but anyone reading what u wrote would have guessed that. u did? fine if u insist.~~

all i can do is watch and wonder

where the boy i knew had gone

2005-06-06T23:36:00.000+08:00

i know what everybody out there`s thinking. yea think what u want. cuz i`m really drained out this time round and i wont bother explaining. read around and if u get what he or she wanna say then yup. u get the story. you get their story.

thank you very much for writing that so now the whole world thinks i`m out to break u n her up. yea so you got wad u want. arent u happy. back then i was still thinking that we can be friends again. but now i dun think we will ever talk again. or i think we should never talk again. you never ever put yourself in my shoes. u just want everything in this world to work for you. you said you did. but apparently by writing all those showed how much you didnt. u had forgotten wad u told me before. perharps everything was just a lie. and i was really stupid to let myself believe in you.

everytime i tell myself i had enough of you

i take you back again

not because i need someone

but because i just can`t pretend

but this time round i think i really had enough.

2005-06-06T00:52:00.000+08:00

damn it. i lost my freaking handphone. no i din lose it. it`s some nice ass out there who apparently opened my bag and STOLE le. hell. some other gals lost it too. should be same person stole de bah. in wild wild wet female changing room. wad a bitch. was still sms-ing dallan lo. den come out of shower it was gone. hais. i`m not pissed off cuz my hp is gone. i mean it`s just a piece of metal n money can buy another better model for me. but i`m jus so freaking sad n disappointed that ALL my msgs in my phone will be gone lo. hais cried n cried n cried. wthh. i saved them since like 2003 k. even if i change phone i still forward the msgs to my new phone de lo. hais. and my recent msgs too. great. so i will never have those msgs back again. arghhh. if the person want the phone so badly jus take it k. i jus wan my sim card backk. pls.

my world is just so upside down now. everything just dont go the way i want. and i have to see things i never thought i would see. feeling things i shouldnt feel. and the problem is i dunno how the hell am i suppose to deal with wad i`m feeling. trying so hard to keep it to myself. bahhs. reality just strucked me. putting a dart through my dreams. through my heart. yup so now i`m back to where i`ve started again. so great huh. lp jo n i suspect that i`m facing depression now. =/ rightt. even i notice the change in me. just compare my first few blog entries and the last few. two diff person lo.

anw happy birthday to pearl ivy n dallan.

~~wtf. why am i dragged inside the picture. when like everything`s is between u n her.~~

how could u do this to me
i thought you said we were meant to be
you showed me how to cry
when i found out everything was just a lie.

2005-06-03T23:30:00.000+08:00

i feel like a total bitch.

~~i`m really sorry. i mean it.~~

what i meant was

you made me fall ...
in love.

2005-06-02T21:53:00.000+08:00

change those words in my lay out le. muz read finish arh! blehh the story is so sad rite. life is unpredictable. LETS LEARN TO CHERISH. hehhs. yup yup. treasure before they`re gone huh.

anw i duno wad to blog bout. anw yesterday went pasa malam with 7(BSU) after the chem lesson. guess who we saw? *drum rolls* A FREAKING BLARDIE MALAY GAY!!! yea u can start puking now. i`m about to. that disgusting piece of shit. k i start my story. ehh it was like we stopped and looked at some things at the pasa malam. then this malay guy ( now that we found out he`s actually a GAY ) walked past us la. we were commenting on his style cuz apparently sway him knocked into spens and too bad. he got our attention. our grp was like commenting if he`s a guy or gal. ( cuz he looked like both at tt time. i swear. LOL.) hey u cant blame us for being so k-po kaes. cuz it`s like if u see this person walking past u. and his disgusting fringe plastered to his oily forehead with tons of gel ( looks like cheapskate kind). with this stupid looking tampered jeans (real tight fitting. and i think it`s gross) that he`s wearing way up high. super diao red shirt( like pasa malam buy tt kind. LOL). walking with his arms sticking to his body like it`s super-glued on. with this stupid act cute pin on his head. who look like half guy half gal. hey u will sure comment de rite. yea so we were discussing if tt alien was a guy or gal. i think he heard our comments and then he turned back to look at us la. oops. den we pretend to look away. yup he turned back and continued walking. hence we started our disccusion again. LOL *oops* yea sway sway. he turned back AGAIN. ya la wads his prob. okay we shld b at fault. =x anw. he caught us again and diao us. den walked away again. yea and this repeated quite a few times. got diao-ed loads of times lo. den we stopped talkin n walked (towards his direction. nah jus wanna cross e road. not to look at him) when we walked past him he said "you see what? never see people before izzit?" -.- his eng is darn broken la can. go brush up first la. but anw it was super LOL. then i was like muttering "yea got see ppl before but nv see gay before lei." LOL. wads his prob lo. den we continued walking further down (now he`s behind us). den suddenly he confronted st la. forgot wad he said. but sth like why keep looking and dun anyhow point at him. lol. st was darn pissed off den shouted "is not i point de la! u idiot!" haha funny. yea that loser gay just walked away. pretending not to hear. humji. omg i feel like slapping him man. freaking faggot. he gay he win izzit? okay la let him win lo. he gay wad. =D gays rawkk la k?

yup today went town with 7(BSU) again. hehhs. like everytime we go out sure will get in trouble de hor. go town bought this cute cute top. haha and a pink tie tt goes along. darn nice. xP yea took neoprint with bimbo lp. with "san ge san ba" (gossip is wad we do). with 7(BSU) as a whole. haha spent so much money. but rawkks lo those neoprints. but the one with BSU is so small la. too many ppl le. upload them next time. when some nice soul help me scan the pics *hint hint* cuz i duno how to operate my damn scanner. then at ljs saw this guy with cut wrist. it`s god damn gross kaes. so so so many lines. and ppl cut at least cut the underside of the arm rite. he purposely cut the upper side lo. that`s y i say i hate this kinda of ppl! attention seekers. jus go die la. oops meanie me.

tmr got lessons! manns i`m super sian diao. haiss morning to like afternoon lo. E maths A maths n chem. save me bahh. more pics below again. ((:

LOL. sexy sexy modern gals.

liping and me.

*SCREAMS* it`s miss yeo!! OMG.

chingay rawkk huh.

we miss dance manns.

hehh. that cute cute han.

sorry for not replying ur sms and calls again. i know i suck. yup i saw wad u typed on msn. chance is not as if i have a choice to give it to you or not. it`s it your hand. wad do u wan me to do? to give u a chance? u just dun understand wad i wan. so i dun see wads the point of u promising me things. things that are not what i sought after all this while. yup and i dun deny i dun understand how u feel either. cuz i really duno. wad u said is really different from wad i see.

if you wanna know

i don`t wanna let go

2005-05-31T19:58:00.000+08:00

okayys first thing to blog bout is to thank all those ppl hu actually smsed me to ask me wad happened n stuffs la. duno is k-po or wadd. LOL jk ehhs. yup and all those forwarded takkiare msgs. thx guys. i love u all. =D but u all dun have to know wad happened la. i`m okay. yea and i wont go commit suicide or wadeva shit kaes. stupid adam. haha. bai chi. talking bout suicide. i shall elaborate on why we shouldnt care bout ppl hu attempted suicide. okayss BSU is so gonna cover their ears. LOL. anyway! ppl hu attempted to commit suicide are just so attention seeking. they climb to the highest storey looking down. fearing. -.- thinking some nice passer-by like those in channel 8 drama will brianwash them and stop them in time. but unfortunately when it`s their unlucky day where nobody walk past them to notice their so called "attempted suicide" ( which they did not mean to commit in the first blardie place ). they feel they should contact someone to notify their friends or family about the death ahead. pretending sms-ing things like " hey take care of blah blah when i`m gone... be a strong guy n live on etc... " which intentionally leaked out "hey i`m on the highest floor. ATTEMPTING SUICIDE. and like save me before i`m gone"( which they will nv be) so the ppl who recieved these sms will reach that place in time and stop them. i mean. if u really want to seek death that much. just go jump down from the highest storey at midnite where nobody will mess up your death plan okayy. and u dun excatly have to carry a handphone with u when u wanna die. if death is really the only one thing left in ur mind. just go empty handed. okay so now ur friends and relatives arrived. crying their lungs out to stop u from jumping. (they shoudnt cuz u wouldnt) they step one foot forward. and u exclaimed " one more step and i`ll jump!" they froze. hey if u really wan to jump just jump okay. it probably just take less then a second to take a plunge off the building. which ur friends or family do not have enough time to stop u. and after much drama. u finally feel that u got enough attention and step down. heading home. -.- okay so u did not die in the end.
another scenerio. a cut on the wrist. hello? if u wan to die cutting that few layers of skin outer skin wont drain away that much of your precious blood that results in death. when there`s like thousands of layers of skin to protect the holy you. and u know it too. cuz if death is really wad u wan u would have penetrate the blade deeper and pain enough for u to realise u will die from it. and will cutting really result in death? i duno. but jumping down a building sure will do. ( okayys contradicting from my prev para )
*pants* i`m done with my speech. LOL. sorry la but just hate ppl who exclaim commited suicide b4. if a suicide is properly planned they wont be here now. hehhs oh no i scared later ppl read my blog le go commit suicide n die then i will feel badd. but seriously la. dun do sha shi. it will just leave ur loved ones weeping n longing for ur presence. and u are just being selfish. thinking that u will have no more worries once u leave this world. but not realising it`s your loved one clearing up all the mess u selfishly left behind. ppl DUN COMMIT SUICIDE. lols. i`m madd. life goes on! no matter wad. actually i respect those hu lives on no matter wad obstacles they face in life then those morons who threatened to die if they cant get sth. ( hate it when lovers break and one of them threaten suicide if the other refuses a patch. ) ur parents din work hard for money to provide u with comfort n shelter in return to attend your funeral. all they wan is to see u live a fulfilled life n carry on the generation right? oh god i`m turning matured. =] sweet sixteen. i hope O level comes out a topic on suicide. =D
hmm ptc wasnt bad at all. okay i should say it`s good. cuz loke n B lim praised me lei. =D say my attitude n studies have improvement. wee! my dad was um-chio-ing lo. think i never see. i spied on him! hehhs. then b4 i leave B lim asked me to tuck in. in the car my dad was like " u mean ur sch uni is tucked in de arhh? then why every morning i fetch u to sch ur sch uni is out? " LOL exposedd. omgg lo now then he knows my sch uni is suppose to tuck in de. -.0 my dad is so funny.
sat went k-box with my aunt and her kid and cousins. her kid so darn ke ai! omg she so cute. she few yrs old only then keep snatching the mike to sing 'honey'. still danced along. but nth matched with those in the MV la. LOL. cute lil ass. my aunt is so in man. she actually know how to sing jolin. jay. f.i.r the songs lo. -.- cooL. my cousins n i were like -.0 june hols gg malaysia with them. hehhs yeah! can play with that cute devil le. today got geo lesson. me jo pearl n lp totally late for 45 mins. LOL. we attended 15 mins of it kaes. =D not bad not bad. after tt went jo`s house. now our eyes all so pain la. LOL. woots i finally know how to upload photos le. hehhs below below. upload others in my next entry bahh. too many le. hehhs.

mr chan! we will miss u de. u rawkk. ):

LOL. swee swan de lao gongg. we no chance le la.

BSU. nvm u dun wanna know wad it means. x) where`s joanna!

pearL n me

wahaha big big heart. 4o2// do de kaes. made of empty cans! go see la. first floor. super chio. =]

i miss PA mann.

~~i`m not.~~

chen ren shi jie bing bu xiang tong hua

wang zi gong zhu hen shao xi ju shou chang

bu shi zhi yao gou yong gan

gou shan liang

jiu you xian nu bang mang shi xian yuan wang

2005-05-27T00:47:00.000+08:00

decided to blogg now. since i`m waiting for my dad to return frm his office n fetch me to ptc. oh no. PTC -.- let`s c wad loke n B lim gotta sayy. nvm la my dad v lac de.
hmm this few days v suckky la. dunno. just dun feel good. wed`s night realised sth and couldnt really slp. so obviously thursday wasnt such a nice day for me. was feeling so sian diao thru out lesson time. tho i should be happy cuz we have free periods for the whole darn day. *claps?* -.- spent the day lying on my table feeling so shitty. thinking thru things (realised it`s excatly 2 months after. 25th is a stupid date.) n was feeling terrible la. those sad songs totally made things worst for me. hmmm but luckily ended up falling aslp. due to the terrible lack of slp ytd`s night. zzZzZ. when i woke up saw a letter on my table. was from the nice nice JOANNA LIM XINYI. read the letter and immediately felt loads better. thx girl u totally rawkks. i know u smiling now. haha. ( omgg i jus realise it`s my first 'haha' in my entry. ok anyway ) and she used pink pen! tho she hates tt color la. hmm but wad she wrote was true la. i was stupid right. yea so dumbb. but i think nw is too late le bahh. like i`ve told u he gave up le. but anw i love ya. jo rox. yup den after sch went IMM with jo spens ben lp st. was eating claypot rice. and totally reminded me of him la. -.0 but the one i ate with him was much nicer then the stupid IMM one. really arhh. no hidden meaning kaess. anyway i`m gg to the 88th dinner la. Blim totally forced 4o2// to go lo. and i realised that it is in the school parade square. -.- total shit. wow? a 'qian ren yan' in such a lousy place. 6o buckks somemore. k la i better go shower now. my dad`s coming home soon. go meet teachers le. =/ damn.

~~okay. so u gave up in the end.~~

i`m sorry if i`ve made you sad.

but remember i feel equally badd.

i`m sorry if i made u teared.

but remeber for one tear you dropped.

i dropped two.

2005-05-23T22:36:00.000+08:00

weets today`s a fun dayy. (: haha finally go out wiv my bbf. LOL like v long nv one to one go out wiv him le ma. erm for ur info bbf doesnt stand for best boy friend. -.0 haha i went out with spencer la. not my boyfriend. stop askingg.
anyway met him at lot 1. haha why lot 1? *scratches head* xP LOL. keep asking wads his motive. no la. kind him said cuz it`s near my house. and lazy me will only agree to come out. hehh he`s right anyway. =D
met le den walk walk. lot 1 not alot of things to buy la. bought earrings n handband n jeans. LOL. hairband again. change color le. white!~ x) omgg then we so lame la. we walk past the sistic counter we decided to play with the person in charge. "excuse me do u sell nan hua`s cultural pot ticket here?" LOL. the woman totally went to check for us lo. she somemore say got lo. i was like thinking "dun waste ur time la. hello? i`m a performer lo. and it ended on sat." super gao xiao. den went to watch house of wax. nono i mean wanted to. LOL. nc 16 la. being the december baby spencer. the person dun let us buy ticket la. sian diao. zZZzz den we thinkk v clever ask a couple help us buy the ticket. they are so cute lo. *screams!* in the end got the ticket le. hmm excited us gg to enter the theatre le den stopped by the person in charge again. check IC. *oh no* exposed! spencer haven 16. LOL keep beggin her let us enter she dun allow. -.0 in the end lucky us found a couple hu wanted to watch house of wax so we sold ours to them lo. =D stupid la. I WANT TO WATCH HOUSE OF WAX!!! somebody above 16 pei me go. grrrrr. den go take neo prints. it`s nice man. haha cute actionns. dinner went ljs eat le den leave le. nice dayy. (: sian la tmr got sch. hais. damn it. i`m super sian diao. hey spens cheer up okayys. things aint bad as wad u think. look on the bright side. know it`s hard la. but jus try. =]

hey i`m really sorry for not replying ur sms-es n calls kaes. it`s not that i dun wan to. seeing the phone ringing n ringing again. and those sms-es flooding in makes me feel bad. the phone was already in my hand and i really wanted to pick up. but it`s jus tt i know even if i pick up i wont know wad to say. and ur sms-es. i already typed it out jus tt i din send. seriously i duno wads happening to me. it`s like i`m trying to keep myself a distance away from you. i know this shouldnt be the case. i rather we return to the past. joking n hitting each other. tt time i was really glad to know you. but now? seriously i will think twice. i`m not saying that i regretted knowing you. hmm jus that. u know it too. things aint the same anymore right. even now i cant bring myself close to you le. cuz rumors will spread. again. that time i tried to listen to u and believed that we shouldnt care bout rumors. but words are easier said than done. i really miss the times when i can just run up to u and punch u everywhere. tell u anything under the sun n stuffs. but now the fact is i cant bring myself to do that anymore. okay mayb i shouldnt have done it from the start anyway. now i cant even bring myself to having eye contact with you. this suckks. why is all this happening? i duno. probably wad dancer said is true. it makes sense tho. i dunno. i`m so confused now. brainwashed. yeayea.

u ask me to reply to ur voicemail right. okayys. u said u thought things were fine. i`m telling you. nothing was fine for me after tt day. i appeared fine to you doesnt mean i was. you assumed things were fine for the both of us because things were fine for you. but not for me. but have u ever put yourself in my shoe? u didnt. this song is how much i`m feeling now. i`m sure u can sense how much we totally drifted. and u said the effort u put in to salvage this relationship? i dun see any. if buying a drink for me every recess is your so called effort. i seriously dunno when will be the day u`ll ever succeed in salvaging this relationship. ya tt time i did promised u tt buying a drink for me everyday will settle everything. but obviously i couldnt ask for more. could i? and it`s not like all these material stuffs can make up everything. den wad do u do to make up for my emotions? sincerity u get it. hmm u wont. anyway your promise was broken half way too. yup. your so called effort huh.

anyway. tmr u dun have to wait for me until i turn up. i wont turn up. hope u`ll read this before tmr. i dun wan u to waste your time there. i`m sorry.

been waiting for so long. it hurts.